Chapter Twenty-Four
The cards inMason’s hands didn’t make any sense. It wasn’t that he hadn’t played this game before. He had at least a dozen times at this point. It was more that his brain didn’t work well enough to make sense of what he held in his hand. These past couple of days made it hard for him to make sense of a lot of things.
He didn’t even want to do board game night but, after his friends heard about Natalie, they insisted on getting together with him. Unlike their usual sessions, the group at the table was uncommonly quiet. They were waiting for him to do something, like play some of his cards…or cry. It could have gone either way.
Mason had half expected his friends to rag on him about being unlucky in love once again. They hadn’t. Also, unlike the Dakota situation, they didn’t immediately complain about Natalie or tell him he was better off without her. Maybe they sensed he didn’t want to hear it. Mason wouldn’t be able to stand listening to how horrible Natalie was, because maybe his brain wouldn’t let him believe it yet.
“Are you going to go, Mase?” Gemma asked.
“Oh, yeah, I…” He squinted at his cards, concentrating harder, but it was of no use. “Sorry, I-I can’t. I just don’t…” He leaned an elbow on the table, hiding the top of his face with the palm of his hand. An arm went around his shoulders, coming from Gemma. “I’m sorry,” he said.
“Oh hell,” said Isaac. “It’s not just you. I really liked her too. I’m just as disappointed as you are. I got sucked in and was rooting for you guys. I feel like we all got dumped.”
“Yup,” Damon said in agreement.
“I don’t know how I could have been so wrong. Am I just really bad at this? I really thought she was it.”
Gemma sighed. “Maybe you’re not wrong. Maybe you’re just wrong about the timing. You have to let her figure some things out, just like you need to figure your own shit out.”
“Geez, Gem, cut the guy some slack.” Jay said. “He probably feels bad enough. We all do.”
“I’m only giving him the truth. And here’s another one. You can’t force someone to be ready for you, and sometimes people aren’t ready.”
“How the hell do I know when someone’s ready?”
“You listen to her.”
Mason didn’t say anything because he was trying hard not to cry. He didn’t want to admit he hadn’t listened to Natalie very well. Her words had struck him out of the blue and he hadn’t been prepared. It was hard to listen beyond his own pain. The hurt was so loud, a freight train could blast through his apartment and he wasn’t sure if he’d hear it.
Not that he considered Gemma wrong. He’d known his friend to be insightful and right about most things. It must be hard for Jay to be constantly wrong, but he didn’t feel too badly for the guy because he at least had someone. Mason had no one. Well, he did have his friends. He had his bees at least. And Mason was lucky his parents were still in great health. They were moving because they wanted to, not because they were abandoning him.
Regardless of how it played out, he didn’t consider one minute he spent with her to be a waste. He couldn’t stop himself from loving her any more than he could use his mind to stop his heart from beating. Gemma was probably right in that Natalie had her own stuff to deal with and one holiday fling wasn’t going to change everything.
His life was something Mason had to figure out on his own with or without Natalie or his parents.
*
A few dayslater, he went to see his dad at the farm. It was time for him to face the situation head on and really think about what he wanted in life. He found his father and Bentley near the barn, pouring wood pellets from a forty-pound bag into a giant bin.
“You need help with that?” he asked, stepping in to grab the bag, but his father shooed him away.
“I got it. I’m not that feeble yet,” Daniel insisted.
“I know.”
He took a breath, ready for an honest conversation with his dad. “I just want you to know that I’m always willing to step in when you need me to. I know that what happened with Dakota really damaged that trust, and I suspect this is the reason you’ve held off on retiring lately. You’ve been waiting on me just as I’ve been waiting on you to forget. And I’m really sorry. It was selfish, and I want you and Mom to have the life you want. I should have done more to prove myself to you, and asking you to forget about me stealing from the company isn’t really fair.”
His father’s eyebrows lifted in concern. “You know I love you, right? I do know that you’re sorry and have been really trying to make up for that bad decision. I’ve seen it. Don’t think I haven’t noticed. Both your mom and I love you and want to give you everything we have.”
Mason swallowed the lump in his throat, fighting past it. “I appreciate that but I think we should talk about the business.”
A proud smile spread on Daniel’s face as he patted his arm. “I don’t think you have anything to worry about, Mase. If you want the business, it’s yours. You did really good this season. I’ll talk to Charlie about it.”
His heart thumped with a tiny beat of joy at the pride his dad would trust him enough with his legacy, but he tamped it down. “I, uh, was actually just talking to Charlie and I think you should sell it to him. He has the money, which you and Mom need, and he loves this business almost as much as you guys do. He’ll be good for it.”
His father’s smile melted away as his brows drew together, as though trying to decipher Mason’s words. “You don’t…want the business?”
He rubbed a hand along his jawline. “I think you were right about me before. I’m not ready. I thought I was ready for it but these last few weeks have had me thinking about other things and what I might be more interested in. You’re right that I can’t explore anything else if I’m under the weight of owning the business. Logically speaking, I think we both know Charlie is the one who should run it. I need to figure out my own shit.”
