Araxis's look grew a little sly, and it was so familiar and comfortable thata lopsided smile curled the edge of my mouth as he said,"Hm, that soundsnice, I suppose.I understand that is your outer limit."
I laughed,reachingforward to shove his shoulder.I pretended that my fingers didn't tingle where they touched him, just like I pretended I didn't see the way that his stare grew heated, just for a moment, as I moved his body by force.
I'd come in here wanting to know what roles each of us would have to play over the intervening months and what would happen when we ventured deep into the abayan empire.I wanted to know how I'd be expected to act and if Araxis also expected that of me.I'd wanted to see if he might be malleable in his own way, if I might push him in a different direction, force him against the grain, just a little.I'd wanted a contract and a plan andaway out.
And I'd wanted to see how it felt to be in the same room with him.To see him and love him and still keep myself under control.I'd wanted to see if I could stand firm in my resolve or if I became pliant and soft around him, regardless of my intention.I wanted to be sure Icouldtake care of myself, that I could love him and still be smart.
I knew I needed to be smart moving forward.There was a lot on the line.
"Alright," I said finally."We've got a plan.We understand each other.As soon as they let us out of here, where are we headed?"
Araxis smiled, then, and took a sip of his cold tea.He grimaced, then tilted his head thoughtfully and took another sip."You know, Sashen, I do not mind this at all.It was perhaps a bit bracing initially – but I enjoy… trying something different."And then he outlined the steps we would take before we travelled with the creche to the centre of the abayan empire.
I'd read before that certain types of trees, once they've been damaged by wind and lightning, can grow back stronger; like scar tissue, the new fibres made their branches more robust, more powerful, impossible to break.Their roots grow deeper; their crowns grow taller.
I hoped that could be us.I thought it could be.
Alet Trident liked to say that I was cocky and arrogant but here, with Araxis, as we contemplated the steps we needed to take next to change the fate of the abayan empire, I didn't feel cocky.
I felt hopeful.And that was something I could get used to.
Epilogue
I stood, one hand pressed hard against the craggy bark as I craned my neck to stare up at the massive branches and thick foliage of the tree overhead.I sucked in a hard, deep breath, a grin wide on my face.The rush of oxygen-rich airalmost made me dizzy; I’d never drawn breaths this full before or, I don’t know,nourishing."I don't understand," I said, staring upwards at the complex network of branches and leaves above me."How does theairsmell so good?"
Next to me, Araxis trilled, delighted.He stood, immaculately dressed in his flight suit, following as I wandered off in the direction of a different tree with a smooth trunk and low hanging branches that seemed to drip down toward the ground."You will be quite impressed when we go to a planet," Araxis said as I ran my fingers down the trailing boughs, the leaves slipping through my hands almost like water.
"I don't know," I said, again twisting my neck to stare upwards.All the branches overhead were like blood vessels or mycelium, a living, breathing network; a glorious tangle of riotous life."I'm not sure how anything could improve on this."I inhaled again, the air sweet and moist.
Araxis's hand settledon the back of my shoulder, his touch familiar and warm –but tentative.Part of me wanted to move away, but the rest of me – the parts I thought of as probably unreliable – melted into him, just a little."Hm, you may be biased because of the quality of the air on the concourse."
"Thatisawful," I admitted, turning to look at him.The dome on the Thenat-2 waystation had called to me back when I'd been looking for a ride.I should have guessed that Araxis would bring us here when we'd been cleared to leave the justiciar's station: I'd told him about the trees, and he'd apparently filed that knowledge away for later use.
Araxis's wristband chimed, his hand dropping away while he called up the message."They're on their way."
I nodded, not sure how I felt about seeing Vivith.I was still chewing my way through my feelings about everything Araxis and Vivith had planned and how easily they'd used me.Araxis, at least, was as contrite as a person could be and seemed resolved to change in order to begin to right some ofhiswrongs, to soothe some of the injuries he'd left me with.
Vivith, though – I doubted that they felt bad in the slightest.They didn't even like me.To their mind, I was probably an unfortunate side effect of getting what they wanted.
That was something Araxis and I were going to need to reconcile at some point.But Vivith was Araxis's hatch-mate, and while their relationship was complicated – Araxishadn'tgiven them permission to steal the eggs, despite what he'd said in the interview; and I was pretty sure it was Vivith who'd been a shit about Araxis being sinnenthi and entinn, who'd entrenched his shame instead of helping free him from that burden – it wasn't one that was just going to go away because Vivith and I butted heads.
Vivith was part of Creche Thiel.They were my creche-mate now, so I had to make peace with Vivith as best I could.I could probably work around to something amicable, if I tried hard enough and practiced biting my tongue.
Araxis reached for my hand – we'd agreed this was okay;since theTournament was still big news and so we'd been recognized practically every four steps when we arrived at the waystation,it made sense for ourperformanceto start now– and led me back through the biosphere toward the shimmering purple door that kept the atmosphere of the park separated from the concourse.We stepped around a series of bushes, thankfully without anything resembling thorns, and that was when I saw them: a tall, lanky abaya with three excited children in tow.
The shield flashed as the four figures entered, and then I heard an excited, fluting cry as Talvi laid eyes on me.They jerked their hand out of Sadin's grip, running toward me at full speed along the stone pathwayas I crouched to greet them.They tumbledinto meat full-speed,slammingmebackwardsso forcefully that I found myselfsprawledbackon the path with a squirming child giggling in my lap.
"Sashen!"Talvi squealed, arms wrapping hard around my neck as I shoved myself up to sitting, their face nuzzling into me while a purr of delightrumbledin their little chest."Our Vivith showed us parts of the Tournament!You were on broadcast, did you know!"
"Yeah, I know," I said, grinning and patting their back."Araxis and I were both there."
"Your face didthis," they said solemnly, and then with great seriousness, they mimed a sneeze.
I laughed, bright and loud.Of course that was what Vivith would have shown the kids.Of course thathadbeen broadcast after all.
"And now you're coming back to our ship!"Talvi continued, blinking up at me with their black eyes.
"I am."My chest was warm andfizzedwith light.
