And I keep seeing Severin, keep hearing him whisper,I’m sorry, Maeve. But he didn’t try to stop me. He let me walk right out of that office, like maybe I don’t mean to him what he means to me.
“I’m going to get help,” Isis announces, already uncoiling herself from around my neck and slithering out from under my chunky scarf and down my arm.
“No, I’m fine,” I say, but Isis doesn’t listen. She slithers upthe stairs at a surprising speed, leaving me sitting there in the stairwell, my heart racing, breath still coming in short gasps.
Did I really just break up with Severin? The thought feels almost ridiculous, because how could I break up with someone that I may never have actuallybeen within the first place? Saying you love someone doesn’t mean you belong to them, or that they belong to you.
But it hurts all the same, down deep in my bones, so much worse than the muscle and body aches brought on by this stupid, stupid cold.
I’m still sitting there, trying to get up the strength to move, when the sound of footsteps on stone reaches me. Boots tap out a hurried pace on the stairs, and as I look up, Raelan comes into view, followed closely by Alina and Yuki. Isis is coiled around Alina’s neck, and if I weren’t feeling so terrible, I’d smile.
Alina was so afraid of Isis when they first met. To see them like this now reminds me of how much we’ve all grown and how far we’ve all come since our first year together.
“What happened?” Raelan says, coming to kneel on the stairs beside me. His brow is furrowed, his dark eyes narrowed in concern.
“N-nothing,” I say, still winded. “I just... got a bit dizzy. But I can make it—”
“No.” Raelan’s voice leaves no room for argument. “You’re sick. You’ve pushed yourself too hard.”
Alina waits a few stairs up from us, arms crossed, her expression a mix of worry and simmering anger. I try to smile at her, but she just shakes her head. “You’re going straight to bed,” she says. “And if you’re not better by morning, we’re taking you to the infirmary.”
“I’m fine,” I say, reaching to brace a hand on the wall.
But before I can get to my feet, Raelan is slipping his arms under me, one beneath my knees and one around my back, and lifting me as though I weigh nothing at all. I let out a breath of surprise as he hefts me into his arms, then curl against him, my fingers finding the fabric of his soft black tunic without me meaning for them to.
I close my eyes as he starts to climb the stairs to room NT33, the sway of my body in his arms trying to lull me to sleep.
When we get to the dorm room, Alina hurriedly opens the door, and Lyra and Poppy are waiting for us on the other side. They say something, but I’m halfway asleep already, and their words don’t register.
Raelan carries me up the stairs to our loft, then eases me gently onto my bed.
“Thank you,” I whisper. Before he can pull away, I snag his sleeve with my fingers and open my bleary eyes. “I’ve never told you this,” I say, “but I think you’re pretty great.”
He lets out a huff of laughter. “You’re pretty great too,” he says, then pulls gently away from me.
Alina appears beside him, face still pinched in worry. Isis slithers down her arm and onto the bed, where she quickly coils herself against me, wedging her head up alongside my neck.
“I’m worried about you,” she hisses.
“I’m fine,” I say.
Alina crosses her arms. “You are to stay in this bed until we say otherwise. And you’re going to eat and drink whatever Poppy makes for you. Understood?”
“Yes, Your Royal Highness,” I say.
She rolls her eyes. “I’m serious, Maeve. You havegotto take better care of yourself. You’ve got finalsandyour fellowship board demonstration coming up. You can’t miss that.”
I groan and turn my head into my pillow. “Don’t remind me.”
“Come on,” Raelan says, reaching out to drape a hand along Alina’s waist. “Let’s let her sleep.”
Alina looks like she wants to give me another lecture, but then she lets out a breath, her tense shoulders drooping. “Try to sleep,” she says. “We’ll bring food and tea up in a bit.”
I nod, eyes already closing.
My eyes are still closed when I hear Raelan and Alina walk away, their boots thumping softly down the stairs from our loft.
And I keep my eyes closed as they fill with tears.
