“Why is this so difficult?” Desmond laughed, unable to stop himself. “I’m supposed to be feeling miserable and penitent right now, not giddy.”
“Who says you’re supposed to feel miserable?” Javier asked, feeling anything but gloomy just then.
“Isn’t that the price of doing the right thing after failing to do it for so long?” Desmond asked, giving up his struggle and sprawling over Javier. “I did something wrong. I should feel bad.”
“Honey, for the last time, when am I going to have to stop rescuing you from ex-boyfriends?” Javier said scoldingly, but feeling like the sun had just broken through the clouds.
“I beg your pardon?” Desmond asked, muscling himself up to look down at Javier.
“This isn’t you talking, sweetheart, it’s the pain Matthew and God knows who else caused you.” Javier shifted to his side and tried to sit so that he could scoot toward the castle’s exit on his bum. “You’re allowed to be happy. You’re allowed to live your life however you want.”
“I don’t think I deserve it after everything I did,” Desmond said, scooting after him.
Anyone looking at them from afar would have no idea they were having such an important discussion. They looked beyond ridiculous. Javier’s headdress had fallen off completely and was nearly strangling him as the chin strap pushed against his throat. Desmond’s shirt had hiked up enough to show some skin, which Javier would have appreciated under any other circumstance.
Once they finally made it out of the bouncy castle and stood in the grass, panting and catching their breaths, Javier stood straight and faced Desmond. “You’re human. You’re allowed to make mistakes. We all did and we all do. You didn’t have to quit your job over it.”
“I wanted to quit,” Desmond said, a flush painting his face and a different sort of light sparking in his eyes. “I wasn’t happy there. I haven’t been happy for a long time.”
Javier blinked. This was something entirely different from what he thought they were dealing with. “Really?”
“Yes,” Desmond said, more energy filling him. “Just because I was good at numbers and figures and charming people at corporate events didn’t mean I liked it. You taught me that.”
Javier arched one glittery eyebrow. “Are you going to blame all this on me?” he asked, not that he minded the idea.
Desmond shook his head. “Not blame,” he said. “You just made me see that I was in the wrong place, with the wrong people. I wasn’t happy there. I’m happy with you.”
Javier sucked in a breath, feeling like the glitter all over him had sunk into his soul. “Baby, that’s the sweetest thing anyone has ever said to me.”
“It’s true,” Desmond said with a nod. “I like who I am on the weekends. I like the way we are together. I know that was supposed to be our bubble separate from reality, but…I like that reality more than the rest of my life.”
Javier met those beautiful words with a smile. “I like it better than the rest, too,” he said quietly.
For a second, the two of them just stood there smiling at each other. Then Desmond said, “So what do we do about it?”
Javier had a few ideas, but before he could say any of them, a different voice cut through the blossoming joy of the moment.
“I didn’t think it was possible for you to make a bigger fool of yourself, but it appears I was wrong.”
The two of them turned together to find Matthew approaching them with a nasty smirk.
twenty
. . .
Desmond was not a man who had ever navigated his emotions comfortably. He preferred they stay in the background of his life and that they came at him one at a time. He most definitely did not appreciate a dozen different emotions flying at his head all at once. Deep love and appreciation for Javier mingled with shame over his actions, but with a hefty dose of hope and perhaps even excitement for where things might go next.
Joining those emotions in a mashup that nearly robbed him of the ability to feel anything for a moment was rage at Matthew and his smarmy smile and outrage that the man would have the audacity to interrupt such an important moment in his life.
All those screaming emotions vying for attention gave Desmond a feeling of righteous indignation that made it impossible for him not to say everything on his mind, starting with, “What the hell are you doing here?”
Matthew’s smug look faltered a little. He most definitely was not used to Desmond standing up for himself or fighting back when he was cornered. “My nephew is friends with the birthday boy,” he said, face flushing. “I volunteered to bring him to the party to give my sister a day off.”
“How very noble of you,” Desmond hissed with scathing fury.
“I don’t know what you think you’re going to prove or accomplish by butting in like this,” Javier said, the most serious and threatening psychedelic flower that had ever graced an English garden, “but you can turn around and walk away right now.
Matthew’s spite returned, and he glanced over Javier with a derisive sniff. “I don’t take orders from the help.”
