Suddenly, Trevor reaches out and covers his hand, pressing it to the top of the cup. Stunned into stillness, Skyler glances down at their hands, then back up at Trevor. As soon as they make eye contact, Trevor jerks his hand away like Skyler’s skin burned him.
Right. Well.
He lets go of the cup and tucks his hand underneath his thigh to prevent any more embarrassing fidgeting.
“Sorry,” Trevor mutters after a few beats too long.
“No, I’m sorry. I know it’s annoying when I do stuff like that.”
Trevor frowns slightly, then shakes his head. “Sky, I never thought you being unable to keep still was annoying.”
Sky.He called him Sky.
Skyler risks another glance at Trevor. His eyes appear less guarded than they were an hour ago, and he seems less hostile.
Trevor’s a good person. One of the best people he’s ever known. And even though Trevor doesn’t love him anymore, he’s still sitting here, willing to spend time with Skyler after all the shitty things Skyler’s put him through. That must be worth something.
He just needs to keep his eyes from straying to the prominent vein along Trevor’s forearm—the one he’s always found so ridiculously hot—because therein lies a temptation he may not be strong enough to resist. By trying not to look at it, though, he ends up focusing on Trevor’s tattoo of the dripping honey wand and thinking of his own bumblebee tattoo. And that’s not good either.
Trevor gives him directions when Skyler eventually drives him back to his house. But as they get close, Skyler realizes he didn’t need the directions. Trevor’s living in the house he bought for his mom after making enough money with the band.
This knowledge makes him both happy and sad at the same time.
When they pull up front, Trevor squirms a bit, and Skyler gets the sense he’s somewhat embarrassed about living here in a modest house. Modest by L.A. standards, of course. It’s a gorgeous house, and Skyler knows how expensive it is because he was there when Trevor bought it.
He reaches out cautiously and sets his hand on Trevor’s leg right above the knee. “It must be kind of hard to live here with the memories of her.”
Trevor looks down at the intrusive hand, then back up at him. “It is, sometimes. But it also felt right, you know? I could never sell it.”
“I get it.” He does. What he doesn’t get is how Trevor can be such a strong person after everything he’s been through. He can’t even imagine losing his own mom. It would destroy him.
At least Skyler was there to help Trevor when Stacey died. Losing his baby, though…Fuck.
Skyler should have been there for him then too. He should’ve called. Should have shown up. He should’ve set aside his pride and his wounded heart and been there for the man who he not only loved, but who was also his absolute best friend in the world for five incredible years.
Instead, he did nothing. Because he was an idiot and a coward. And he figured that Trevor had Sierra then and didn’t need him anymore. When he heard the news of Trevor and Sierra separating so soon after, he didn’t know what to think or feel.
But shit, his own feelings shouldn’t have mattered. All that should have mattered was finding out what Trevor needed and giving it to him. Maybe if he’d done that…
Well, he can’t afford to think about that anymore. He needs to focus on right now. Because right now, Trevor’s here. And Skyler has to say something before he lets him get out of the car.
“I’m glad we did this,” he starts lamely.
Trevor nods. “Me too.” He opens his mouth to say something else, but hesitates, shifts in his seat. Then—“Sorry I was such a dick on the phone. And, er, at the park, I guess.”
“Don’t apologize.”
“Okay.”
“So,” Skyler says.
“So,” Trevor repeats.
The moment builds until it feels like the direction of the rest of Skyler’s life relies on what comes next.
“Do you maybe want to think about doing this again sometime?” he asks, praying it’s not too much. That he’s not going to scare Trevor away. That Trevor’s not going to say he still hates him, and he only showed up to tell him that, and he doesn’t want anything to do with him ever again.
“Uh, sure. Yeah,” Trevor says slowly. “That would be nice.”
