‘She works in recruitment now,’ Kerry says through a mouthful of sushi. ‘So I’m guessing the answer is yes.’
The waiter brings my soup in a small brown bowl. I thank him but he isn’t listening. Kerry pours herself some fizzy water from the table tap. ‘Anyway, I didn’t bring you here to talk about Karen Stevens; I want to know what happened with your two boys.’
‘Ugh, where do I start?’
‘Start with the Filmhouse man . . . Please don’t tell me he was shit in bed. I’ll be crushed.’
I grab my second plate off the belt. ‘He wasn’t; in fact he was sublime. You know the way one-night stands are usually all awkward and . . .’
‘Rushed?’
‘Exactly. This wasn’t. This was slow and exciting. It was like he was determined to make sure he blew my mind. We had a connection. Well, until . . .’
Kerry is staring at me intently. ‘Well?! What happened?’
‘Afterwards he went all weird. Distant, y’know? Like he’d just spent hours making sure every part of my body came into contact with his tongue, and then he was all “See ya!” and pushing me out the door at two a.m. If we’d had an average time, I could understand it, but up until then I really thought we’d clicked. I did let it slip about the column though; that might be the reason.’
Kerry drops her chopsticks and frowns. ‘Why would he care about you writing a column? I think it’s more likely that he’s just a prize wanker. He could have at least pretended to give a shit until you left.’
‘EXACTLY!’ The waiter with the blue watch glances my way and I lower my voice. ‘So let’s just say, I don’t expect I’ll be hearing from Dylan any time soon.’
‘Shame, I had high hopes for him. I told Kieran I thought you had met the one.’
‘Oh, behave. If I end up with a shithead like him, I’ll kill myself. Tom is a much better prospect.’
She picks up her chopsticks and hits them off mine. ‘Yes! Fuck Dylan right in his sexy, sexy face. This Tom one sounds much saner.’
‘He is, and he’s very polite . . . and sweet! There’s a lot to be said for sweet.’
‘Sweet?’
‘Yes. A gentleman.’
Kerry purses her lips together and sits quietly.
‘Oh, come on, what the hell is wrong with sweet? Kieran is sweet!’
Kerry laughs. ‘Sweet? On our second date Kieran whispered in my ear that he was going to shag me until I couldn’t walk. His words, not mine. See? You’re blushing now and so was I. Those are not the words of a “sweet” man.’
‘Perhaps if I wasn’t pretending to be so bloody repressed, he would be more forthcoming . . .’
Kerry grins. ‘That boy is going to get a fucking shock when you finally unleash. You sure you want to keep doing it this way?’
I pause and pour some more soy sauce into my little bowl. ‘Not really, but I am nothing if not dedicated to my job. Besides, Tom’s handsome as hell. I have a strong, sexual need to see where this goes.’
Kerry picks up a pink-rimmed plate and makes a face at the contents. ‘I can tell you how this will go, Cat. He’ll fall madly in love with the prim and proper you, until one morning he’ll catch you dancing in your pants to Azealia Banks with your hair in bunches and he’ll have you sectioned.’
‘That’s unfair. I defy anyone to listen to “212” and not dance like they’ve been tasered.’
‘I agree, but Tom might be hoping he wakes up to a girl who tiptoes around to “Tubular Bells” in the mornings.’
‘I’m not Linda Blair, Kerry.’
‘Oh, you know what I mean. Something inoffensive and twinkly.’
I have no idea what she means.
*
