I make my excuses and move on to other things. A personal capacity? Unless that involves me personally removing his inappropriate arse from this warehouse, rather than the bouncers, I think fucking not.
I finally make it back to Ellis, who thankfully is still around.
‘Sorry about that,’ I say, sitting back down beside him.
‘Not a problem,’ he replies.
‘These launch events are—’
‘I’d like to take you out sometime.’
My work-related musings come to an abrupt halt. ‘Take me out? Like a date?’
‘No, like a sniper. Yes, like a date. You know, with dinner and drinks. Awkwardness over who pays the bill, which I will obviously, just putting that out there.’
If he’d said this to me on the ship, I would have accepted in a heartbeat. But he didn’t. He made it clear that he wasn’t ready for any of this. He senses my pause.
‘I get it,’ he says. ‘You have every right to be hesitant. I haven’t done this since Abby passed and it scares the shit out of me, I won’t lie.’
‘I really like you, Ellis,’ I tell him. ‘But I don’t want to be the one you’re dating when you realise that you’re still not ready.’
He lowers his head and exhales. ‘I can’t make you any promises, Sophie, but nothing in life is certain, right? You can’t promise me that six months down the road you won’t decide you hate my snoring and dump me for someone quieter who doesn’t work away from home for ten weeks at a time. All I know is that week we spent together, Sophie, every day I looked forward to seeing you. Spending time with you. Talking with you. I haven’t laughed so much in a long time. And that kiss. It meant something. I’d really like to see where this goes.’
My face bursts with delight. I wonder if this little speech was off the cuff or preprepared before he came out tonight. I don’t care. It was perfect. Despite my attempts to minimise it or convince myself otherwise, he’s right. Our time together. It did mean something.
Part of me just wants to burst into song, but another, less weird part wants to hang back a touch. Be more like Mum.I’m playing my cards close to my chest. Don’t want him to think he’s won me over quite yet.
‘The snoring,’ I ask. ‘Exactly, how loud are we talking?’
‘Funkytown would seem like a library in comparison.’
As we lock eyes, a shiver runs through my body. The good kind. The best kind. My plan to play it cool lasts exactly thirty seconds.
‘One more question,’ I say.
‘Shoot.’
‘Can we kiss before this date? Because I swear to GOD if you don’t kiss me right now. . .’
He pulls me towards him and places his mouth on mine. If I wasn’t still at a work function, I would climb this man like a tree. It’s even better than the first time we kissed. If it meant something, then it means even more now.
‘So, is that a yes then?’ he asks.
I smile. ‘It’s the easiest yes I’ve said all year.’
Epilogue
‘I cannot believe I’m on a cruise,’ Naomi moans. ‘It’s quite frankly unacceptable.’
She peers over the side of the ship. ‘Is it too late to back out?’
I watch as the pier slowly disappears from view. ‘Hmm, I’d say yes. Unless you fancy swimming?’
She sighs. ‘Salt water and a spray tan do not mix.’
It’s been two years since I last boarded theOcean Belle, and here I am again. Pale and covered in factor fifty. Although it looks exactly the same, for me, so much has changed.
A few months after I returned to London, I decided to continue with tango lessons. My £40 shoes and I now attend Amaya’s class on Thursday nights. I’m actually pretty good at it and have the best forward ocho in the class, if I do say so myself. I’ve also made some friends there. After lessons we go out to eat and it’s become my highlight of the week.
