Page 104 of Ballrooms & Blackmail

Not until she knows?—

I step out of her hold. “We were brought in front of the Board,” I whisper. “Claudette and I, and they hurt her, little hen. Worse than any time before. My father held a gun to my back, told me if I made so much as a sound, he’d kill me. I should have let him,” I rasp. “Because all I did was stand there and watch as they—” My throat goes tight. “And, fuck, Sergio got off on it. Like every time she screamed, it turned him on.”

River shudders.

“And I did nothing. I stood there with the gun to my back, and I let it happen.”

“Thorn,” she murmurs.

“And then, when my father told me I needed me to prove my loyalty, I…” I grit my teeth together, give her the last of it. “I took his gun and I shot her in the head.”

River gasps, stumbling back a step.

“She was dying. Suffering and?—”

She takes another step back.

“I had to,” I finish.

Silence falls, and God, that’s almost worse than finally telling her everything.

Especially as her eyes close.

As a tear slips free, slides down her cheek.

The sight of that glittering orb slams into me like a two-by-four to the temple.

“I’ll go,” I tell her.

She jerks, eyes flying open. “Thorn?—”

I shake my head. “You don’t have to say anything.”

“Yes, I do. I—” But she doesn’t finish her sentence because her chest hitches, a sob echoing through the air.

And then that awful silence falls again.

The wind picks up, and a strand of hair flies forward, drifts across her cheek.

I reach out, intending to brush it back.

She flinches.

Fuck.

That fucking hurts.

But it’s enough. It’s confirmation. She knows what kind of man I am and…she doesn’t want me to touch her.

I should feel relieved.

Instead, it feels like I’m dying.

I need to get the fuck out of here.

“Thorn,” she says again.

“Let’s get you back inside, little hen,” I order softly. “It’s getting colder.”