“I don’t like him, Jude. I’m not saying you have to choose between us, but it’s going to be uncomfortable for all three of us whenever we’re in the same room.”
I toss my head back against the couch. “You still haven’t even given him a chance! The one time you spent with him, you were cold and rude.”
“Well, he didn’t do anything to impress me, either!” Nikki counters. “All he did was find any excuse to flirt with you or touch you.”
I angrily shake my head. “You really don’t know what you’re talking about.”
“Oh, but I really do.”
“You don’t understand.”
“What is it that I don’t understand?”
Fuck it. “He’s ace!”
Nikki stills. “He’s what?”
“Asexual,” I say, throwing my hands up. “He went to an EQA meet with Max and Theo and talked to some other ace people and felt seen in a way he hadn’t before.”
Nikki’s expression morphs several different times, going back and forth between amusement and disdain. “Oh, babe–”
“So that’s why I’m telling you that he’s not a?—”
“Oh, Jude, you don’t seriously believe him, do you?”
My body stiffens. “What?”
“He’s lying to you. That’s just a ruse to get closer to you. Isn’t it obvious?”
“Nikki, you’re way out of line.”
She lets out a dry laugh. “Oh, my god, he’s such a piece of—oh my god, that’s actually genius! Nice guys are evolving, and it’s working.”
I shoot to my feet and glare down at her. “What the actual fuck? I shouldn’t have even told you that—he told me in confidence—but I felt there was no other way for you?—”
“Oh, he told you in confidence?” Nikki also bolts up, setting her wineglass on the coffee table with a loudthunk. “Let me guess: he hasn’t told anyone yet, not even his closest friends? Not even his two other queer roommates, who would absolutely accept and support him, no questions asked?No,he only came out to you because he needs you to know you can trust him and let your guard down around him.” Her eyes bore into mine. “Did I get it right?”
Tears sting behind my eyes, and all I want is to leave. Or make her leave. Or just disappear—anything but this. But once again, I’m frozen in place, completely at a loss for words.
“He’s manipulating you, Jude,” Nikki continues when I don’t argue. “He’s feeding you a carefully crafted lie to get closer to you, and it’s working. You guys already hang out and text all the time, and now all he has to do is wait until I’m out of the picture.Then he’ll swoop in with a ‘whoops, I guess I wasn’t ace after all because I’ve fallen in love with you’ line, and it’ll fucking work because–”
“I’m leaving.”
Nikki gawks at me. I’m just as surprised by the words as they leave my lips, but now that they’ve been spoken, I can’t take them back.
“Fine,” Nikki snaps. “Go ahead. There’s the door.”
It takes a moment for my legs to cooperate, but I snatch up my blazer and head for the door.
“Give me a call when he confesses his love to you,” Nikki calls after me. “I’ll try not to say ‘I told you so’.”
I let the heavy door slam behind me as I speed-walk to my car. With tears already spilling over, I wait until I’m safe in the driver’s seat before I start sobbing.
Friday, October 24, 2025
Nikki
hey, can we please talk?
