“Even if it’s to protect someoneIlove?”Iasked, my voice choking up.Morgan’sexpression melted into sympathy, and she caught me asIbent over, sobbing into her arms.
“Especially then,” she said. “IfJackandIare any indication, it’s that when it’s right, you won’t have to give up any part of yourself in order to be with each other.Eitherthe universe will giveyou another way, or you can forge that path for yourself.Butyou can’t sacrifice your own passion.Especiallynot you.”
We stood there for several minutes, me crying ontoMorgan’sshoulder, dampening her curls with my tears.Peoplewalked past, a few goodSamaritansstopping to ask if we were okay and if we needed anything.Itwas the fourth time this happened thatIfinally broke away fromMorganand dried my eyes.Theyweren’t even wet anymore, just puffy and sore.Iwas sureIlooked likeI’dhad an allergic reaction.
My conversation withMorgandidn’t fix anythingpractically.Iwas still in the same positionI’dbeen in that morning.Butit fixed something inside me: the imposter syndromeI’dbeen feeling for months, watching how much love and passionTeddypoured into what she did.ButMorganwas right–Iwas passionate, too.Andcompetent.AndIdidn’t know if anything would work out withTeddy, butIwouldn’t let that stop things from working out for me.
* * *
The next day,Iwas trying desperately to distract myself from the fact thatTeddywas leaving that afternoon; at two thirty, from whatFatimahad ascertained.ThoughIwasn’t sure why she’d felt the need to tell me that.WhatcouldIdo about it?
After a couple of hours of mindless gaming, my stomach grumbled, soIpicked up my phone to order another takeaway.Itwas thenIrealisedIhad four notifications: a text fromDomino’sabout their daily deal, several messages in the group chat checking in and sending memes, a message fromLaureninviting me to a party and wishing me a belated happy birthday…
And an email.FromDafyddfuckingChen.
I sat up straight, my breathing quickening asIopened it.
From: [email protected]
Subject:RE:TeddyCooper
HiChloe,
Thanks again for taking the time to walk me through your ideas, and to share your thoughts on the local hiring policy attached to the grant.I’vebeen having some conversations, andI’dlike to discuss the outcome with you.Giveme a buzz at your earliest convenience.Thanks.
Warm regards,
Dafydd
“Just put the news in the fucking email!”Iscreamed asItapped on the phone number in his signature, my heart hammering inside my chest.Thephone rang twice beforeAntoine,Dafydd’sassistant, answered.
“He’s been waiting for your call,”Antoinesaid onceItold him whoIwas. “I’llput you through now.”
“Thanks!”Isaid, perhaps too loudly–IsworeIeven heardAntoinelaugh as he put me through– then listened to the hold music, which at any other time would have been surprisingly catchy.
“Chloe?”
My heart leapt atDafydd’svoice.
“Dafydd!”Isaid, trying to keep my voice a little bit calmer this time. “Ijust got your email.”
“Good, good,”Dafyddsaid, andIwanted to jump through the phone and into his brain to extract the news directly. “So, asIsaid,I’vehad some conversations, andIhave an answer for you.”
“Oh, yeah?”Itried not to let my impatience come through, but clearly failed, becauseIheardDafyddchuckle on the other end.
“Sorry,” he said. “Iwon’t drag this out.Theother grant administers agree that, as long asGwenynenis able to qualify as a sponsor and manage that sponsorship on their own,TeddyCoopercan be the recipient of funds designated for local hiring.”
I swore that my heart stopped beating. “Really?Shecan?”
I could hear the smile inDafydd’svoice. “Yes, she can.”
My heart left my body altogether.Ileapt to my feet, my controller clattering to the floor in front of me, butIdidn’t care.Iliterally punched the air in excitement.
“Thank you!”Iscreeched into the phone. “Dafydd, you’ve done a really, really good thing here.Youwon’t regret it.”
“ButChloe,” he said, andIpaused mid-dance move.
