"You'll know it the rest of the way eventually." She squeezes my arm once and lets go. "I had a coach like that when I was fourteen. Different specifics, same dynamic. He made me feel like skating was his vision and I was just the vehicle. He even… made some advances toward me. My mom found out and fired him." She starts moving again, slow and deliberate. "It took me years to understand that he was wrong. Skating was always mine. Nobody can take that. Not a coach, not an injury, not a fall at Nationals."
I blink hard. "How did you find your way back to it?"
"Teaching," she says immediately, no hesitation. "The first time I put a scared little kid on the ice and watched her face when she glided for the first time, something clicked back into place." She looks at me sideways. "You loved it before anyone told you that you should. That love doesn't go away. It just gets buried sometimes."
We skate in silence for a minute. My ankle feels solid under me, steady, not the traitor it's been since the fall.
“Have you ever thought about coaching?” Anna asks.
Startled, I glance up. “Uh, me?”
“Yes.” She laughs. “Do you like kids?”
“I… do…” I’m trying to picture myself coaching. Is that a role I would even like? Maybe. I picture myself sitting on the boards, watching a girl skate. Calling out the occasional praise or correction.
“Yeah, I can see that,” I finally answer.
“Excellent.” Anna looks like I just told her that I won the freaking lottery. “You should check out a couple of classes. While you’re trying to decide if you can skate competitively again, it’ll keep you active. And it’s a fun way to earn money.”
“Wow. Coaching. Thanks for the idea.”
“It’s my pleasure.” She comes to a stop, glancing at her watch. “I’m afraid I have to go. Do you mind if I hug you?”
“No.” I open my arms and embrace Anna. My eyes mist over. Never in my wildest dreams did I ever think I would be hugging Anna Harstroke. “Thank you so much. You were such a huge impact on me. This visit was like… everything.”
“Aww.” She hugs me harder. “You’re so sweet! Maybe when I come through Seattle next time, we can grab coffee or sometghing.”
“Omigod.” I fan myself. “Anna Harstroke just asked me for coffee. I’ve died and gone to heaven.”
As if on cue, Alex skates onto the ice, waving to Anna. "Thank you so much for coming out."
"Any time." She skates off, doing a jump casually as she goes, moving off the ice and into the tunnel. "Call me if you need help, Mollie!"
I turn to Alex, jumping on him and kissing him. He catches me and smiles.
"So did I nail your birthday present or what?"
"You so did." I squeeze his hand. "That was really inspirational."
"Good. I'm glad. Did you get any ideas from Anna?"
I give him a secretive smile. "Maybe. Anna has a lot of love left to give younger skaters. Maybe I could do that too?"
"An excellent idea. I think you'd be a great coach."
I swallow, trying not to flinch. "Yeah. It gives me a lot of thinking to do."
We unlace our skates side by side on the bench. I keep sneaking looks at him, this ridiculous man who flew in my skating idol because he knew it was exactly what I needed. He catches me looking and raises an eyebrow.
"What?"
"Nothing." I bump his shoulder with mine. "So what are we doing for the rest of my birthday?"
"Well." He straightens up, stretching his arms over his head, supremely casual. "I was thinking I could call Beck, get a reservation somewhere nice, make a whole night of it."
“Are you serious?” I stare at him. "Please don't."
He loses the battle with his smile immediately. "Of course not. I knew you'd say that."
