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And he did, hoisting her by the hips and seating her on his desk as he swept papers away with one commanding hand. He parted her thighs, standing between them, as he kissed her with both thoroughness and urgency. She drove her hands through his hair, careful even now to avoid his scars, unsure if they might pain him. Not wanting anything to break this moment.
‘Touch me, Alex,’ she half whimpered. ‘Touch me more, please.’
He slid his hand along her thigh, making her squirm as his fingers found her bare flesh. And then higher still, and she let out a moan of both pleasure and frustration. More. She still wanted more.
And then he was at her centre, touching her with such intimacy and expertise that she felt as if she were flying apart. Still it wasn’t enough.
Emboldened by her desire, she reached for his zip. Alex tore his mouth from hers. ‘Milly...’
‘You don’t receive visitors, remember?’ she said, feeling reckless, and his little smile made her want to sing.
Then his face darkened with passion as he tugged at his zip and pulled her even closer, settling himself between her thighs.
Milly braced herself against him as he began to slide inside her, the invasion both sweet and strange and so much.
‘Tell me if I’m hurting you,’ he gasped, and she shook her head, her head pressed against his shoulder as her body adjusted and together they found their rhythm.
‘You’re not. You’re not at all.’
And then she lost the power to speak, to think; all she could do was feel the exquisite pleasure of his body inside hers, the overwhelming intimacy of it, this act that would bind them together for ever. Nothing could split this asunder. Nothing.
And when she came, it was like the splintering of stars, the word dissolving and then coming together again with a new, crystalline brightness as he cradled her in his arms, holding her as if he’d never let her go. And in that moment, she knew she didn’t want him to.
Yet he did, easing back slowly, looking stunned by their explosive interaction. ‘Did I hurt you?’ he asked in a low voice, and Milly nearly laughed aloud.
‘No.’ She regarded him closely, trying to figure out what was going on behind those shadowed eyes. ‘Did you think you did?’
‘I lost control.’
‘So did I.’ She paused, the confidence that their lovemaking had given her starting to seep away. She was cold and sticky and her skirt was rucked up to her hips. She wriggled to try to get it down and give herself a modicum of modesty. ‘Does that have to be a bad thing?’ she asked cautiously.
‘No, I...’ Alex shook his head, raking his hand through his hair as he turned away to do up his trousers. ‘I never expected this.’
He didn’t sound particularly pleased, and Milly had no idea why. Surely a physical attraction between them was a good thing, especially if he wanted a child? Briefly she thought of the pregnancy test in her bag, and then pushed the image away. She couldn’t be pregnant. She couldn’t deal with being pregnant, not now, so soon. Surely it had just been stress.
‘Expected what, exactly?’ she asked as she eased herself off his desk and straightened her skirt. Her lips felt swollen from his kisses, her body aching in a rather lovely way. Still, she felt the need for caution; Alex certainly seemed guarded. No matter how uninhibited they had been moments before, in the throes of passion, things clearly were different now.
‘Expected us to have...a physical attraction.’ He turned back to her. ‘It wasn’t in my planning.’
‘Well, surely you can make room for it?’ Milly suggested, trying to smile. ‘It will make trying for a baby more pleasant, at least.’
‘Yes, I suppose.’ He still didn’t look happy about it, though, and Milly wasn’t brave enough any more to try to tease him out of it. In truth she had no idea what to do now.
‘So you’re not going to annul the marriage,’ she said at last, because that felt like the most important thing.
Alex hesitated, making her freeze. Surely after what they’d just experienced, what they’d shared, he wouldn’t...?
‘No,’ he said at last, sounding reluctant. ‘I won’t.’
* * *
Alex had no idea how to feel. What had just happened...what he’d just felt...what Milly had felt...
It had blown his mind. Destroyed all his preconceptions. And left him spinning in a void of unknowing, because nothing about their business arrangement had made him expect that. And that had been amazing. Incredible. The best sex he’d ever had, because it hadn’t just been sex.
And therein lay the problem. They were treading on thin ice, moving into dangerous waters. Emotional ones.
‘Alex?’ Milly straightened her skirt, looking uncertain. ‘Why do you look as if you’re not happy about this?’
