“Drink up.” Danny pushed to his feet. “We’re going somewhere to celebrate you finally coming to your senses.”
“Did you hate him that much?” Kaden asked.
Danny shrugged. “He was an arsehole, though you could just have told him to fuck off.”
Kaden sighed. No point telling the truth when there was no evidence of the harsh beating. “I’ll meet you out front. I need to collect my money for the gig.”
These are your friends?
“Yes. Two since university. Danny, the lawyer, and Euan, who’s in banking. Ben’s in sales. He’s a new addition to the group.”
I’m not sure I understand all humour yet. Will you teach me to recognise when something is funny?
“I’ll try. Shush again now.”
When Kaden went outside, Ben had his arm slung over Euan’s shoulder. “Neon?” Ben suggested.
Kaden shook his head. “Not for me. Harris is going there tonight. Though I suppose he might not now with a broken nose, but I’m not taking the chance.”
“We’ll protect you.” Euan nudged him. “You need to find someone gorgeous to shake your arse at. Show Harris what he’s lost.”
Kaden thought about what he was currently dealing with in his life and shook his head, rather than his arse. “I’m too tired. It’s been a long day. Thanks for coming to see me, guys. You’ve no idea how much I appreciate it.”
“We can go somewhere else,” Ben said. “How about Location. That’s fun.”
Kaden saw the hope in Ben’s eyes and his heart sank. “No, go to Neon. I’m off home. I’ll come out another night, I promise.”
He was relieved when the three of them finally left him, and he made his way to the bus stop.
Why didn’t you want to go with them? You’re not that tired. Why did you lie?
“Because Ben wants to ask me out and I don’t like him like that. I don’t want to spoil our friendship.”
Ask you out?
“To go on a date. Be my boyfriend. We choose who we want to go out with. Well, that’s not strictly true. Some cultures do arrange marriages for their kids, though not gay ones that I know of. Only in books. Most people date, do fun things together and they either fall in love and stay together, or they don’t fall in love and break up and one or both are sad. And after their heart is mended, they look for someone else to love.” That sounded so simple. It wasn’t.
Explain love.
“You don’t know what love is?” Kaden was shocked.
No.
He’d thought it would be a universal concept. Multiversal even. Though maybe that was just wishful thinking. Didn’t everyone need love of some sort? It was the glue that held so much together. As well as the hammer that broke things apart.
“It’s not an easy thing to explain.” Kaden thought about it. “Love is a much greater word thanlike. Love’s a complex, intense feeling of affection and attachment to someone. Not always to another person. Sometimes an animal or possibly a thing. Children love their teddies. People love their pets. But usually, romantic love is between one person and another. Maybe more than one other. You hope it’s reciprocated. Love means you want that person to be happy and well. Being with them makes you happy. Beyond happy.”
Kaden took a deep breath. “Love is when you want someone so much that the thought of losing them physically hurts. But there are different sorts of love. I love my dad in a very different way to how I’d love a boyfriend. Before you ask, I didn’t love Harris. At first, I thought I might. He ticked all the right boxes, but…later, he didn’t.”
A bus arrived just after Kaden reached the stop. He tapped his phone to pay, went up to the top deck and sat towards the back.
You should eat. You didn’t eat.
Kaden didn’t like to eat before he went on stage but Joe was right, and he was hungry now.
“What sort of thing did you eat?”
Bland food in cubes. A balanced mixture of textures and flavours. Everything is carefully regulated on my planet. Work. Leisure. Meals. Travel. Reproduction. We all have set roles. We all have schedules. We all live in the same sort of spaces. We look similar to those doing the same role. We’re not…encouraged tothink for ourselves. Others decide what is in our best interests.
