“Was the girl a redhead?” he asks quietly.
I look over at him, he’s blurry through my tears, but I know the answer. Hell, I memorized that photo instantly.
“Yeah.”
“She’s my cousin. She was going to another school in Texas and came up for the party with some friends. I hadn’t seen her in years. My cousin, Tawny. Not some girl I was hooking up with, my fucking cousin. You threw us away for nothing.” His voice cracks on that last sentence and he drops his head into his hands.
My tears are falling freely now as the weight of what I’ve done comes crashing down.
“I’m sorry.” I don’t know what else to say. My heart is breaking all over again as I realize what I’ve lost.
“Me too.”
A foolish part of me wants Mac to pull me into his arms and tell me it’s all okay, that we will be okay. I want him to forgive me. But he doesn’t. Instead, after a moment he just stands up, grabs his hat off the ground and heads back up the ladder without another word.
So much for making things less awkward between us; I’m pretty sure I just made it a thousand times worse. I head back inside, keeping my head low as I hurry into my office. Minutes after I’ve closed the door, it bangs open again and one of my twin sisters, Kayla, comes in.
“Holy shit, is that Mac I see out there? He lookshot!”
I look up from my desk and Kayla takes one look at me and hurries over to crouch beside me. She grabs my hands and holds them tightly.
“Tawny, what’s wrong? What happened?” Worry is evident in her words and it makes my tears start to fall all over again.
“Mac. He…we…” I can’t say it.
“Hang on. We need Ella.” Kayla stands up, keeping one hand holding mine as she types out a message to our sister with the other. Ella must have been at her cottage next to the inn, because it’s not long before she comes hurrying in as well.
“What’s going on? Tawny?” Ella’s face is etched with worry and I can’t take it anymore. The tears are pouring down my face and I’m sobbing.
Somehow my sisters get me over to the couch that lines one wall. We pile onto it, me in the middle and my younger twin sisters flanking me on either side. They hold me and let me cry for a while, and when I can finally take a breath without making an embarrassing sobbing noise, I tell them my secret.
I was in love with my best friend and I ruined it.
Neither one of them seems shocked by my revelation and Ella even admits she suspected Mac and I were dating in high school. But when I get to the part with the photograph and the ensuing fallout, Kayla flings herself back on the couch muttering “Oh my God.” Ella shakes her head and squeezes my hand sympathetically.
“I know. I was a fool. A total idiot and a chicken for not talking to him about it. But I was scared, I was scared that we were drifting apart with him in Texas and me here, and seeing him with another girl just felt like my fears were coming true. I panicked.” I drop back against the couch and cover my face with my hands. “And now I don’t know if he’ll ever forgive me. I ruined everything.” A fresh round of tears threaten to fall and when Ella hears my sniffle, she hands me a tissue.
“Tawny, this isn’t completely your fault. Mac could have tried harder to talk to you, he could have called one of us, or tried to see you when he came home,” she says hesitantly.
I sit up and take a deep breath in and out, then I tell them the rest.
“No. He couldn’t. Because the next month was Mom and Dad’s funeral, and I let Rory Montgomery hug me. Mac saw that and he assumed I had cheated onhim, and that Rory was the reason I stopped answering his calls. So he stopped calling and now ten years later I know the truth. I screwed up.”
“Oh.” This comes from Kayla, who has sat up and is leaning her head on my shoulder. “You weren’t just grieving Mom and Dad dying, you were grieving losing Mac, too. And you had to do it alone.”
All I can do is nod.
Ella wraps her arms around me and Kayla layers hers on top. And we just sit there, huddled together, as my sisters, my best friends, let me fall apart once again. At least this time, I’m not alone.
Chapter five
Mac
I finish fixing the shingles on the inn’s roof in record time, clean up, and get in my truck and drive away from Tawny as fast as I can. I didn’t miss her sisters rushing into the inn and I wonder if she’s going to tell them what happened between us.
Fuck, I still can’t believe it. One goddamn picture of me and my cousin Holly was all it took to destroy a relationship that I thought was headed towards marriage.
I’m angry, and hurt, and insulted, and…weirdly hopeful. Tawny hadn’t disappeared because she stopped loving me. But how the hell could she ever think I would cheat on her?
