Hers.
He moved to the side and looked down at her. "I cheated you." He bent down and kissed her lingeringly. "Forgive me. I needed you too much. I couldn't wait."
She looked at him in bewilderment. "Cheated? But I found it very pleasant." It was an understatement. It was true she still felt restless and oddly unfinished, but . . . "Should there be something else?"
"Oh, yes." He grimaced. "Dammit, I wanted it to be perfect for you. All those years I pictured how it would be and I--"
"Stop complaining. I'm content." She huddled close to him. She knew him so well, yet Kadar's naked body felt strange against her own. Smooth in places, corded with muscle in others, the hair on his chest wiry and male against the softness of her breasts. Strange and stimulating. "Just stay with me."
"It's late. I have to get you back to the castle." He sat up and reached for her gown. "Put it on."
"I want to go back to the ship with you."
He shook his head.
"Why not?" Her smile faded as she gazed at him. "What's wrong?"
"Other than the fact I pulled you down in the dirt as if you were a whore from the streets?" He was throwing on his clothing, not looking at her. "It was a mistake. God, what a mistake."
"I didn't--What are you talking about? I wanted it."
"You didn't want it, dammit. How could you know whether you wanted it or not? You were a virgin."
"Well, I wanted to be close to you."
"So I took what I wanted because I knew you wouldn't refuse."
"Why are you talking in this foolish way?" Her hands clenched nervously. "You're confusing me. I came to you because you told--I had to show you that I trusted you."
"And I made you pay the price. Christ in heaven, don't you realize you could be carrying my child?"
Guilt? She smiled, relieved. "Is that all? That's nothing that can't be mended. Wed me, Kadar."
"I can't."
A chill went through her. "You don't wish to wed me?"
"I can't. " His lips tightened. "I'm going away tomorrow."
She stared at him, stunned. "There were no plans for another voyage. Where?"
He was silent.
" Tellme."
He shook his head.
"When will you be back?"
"I'm not sure."
"I'll go with you."
"Not where I'm going."
"Anywhere."
He shook his head again. "You have to stay here."
