Oh no. Am I out with a gym bro? It’s usually an automatic no for me when I see a guy flexing in front of a mirror, gym equipment behind him. I must have really been off my game when I was swiping last week.
“That’s . . . great for you,” I say.
“That wasn’t always the case, though. I found something that completely changed things for me,” he says.
Then he picks up his briefcase and pulls out some papers. He places them on the table in front of me. The top sheet says “ZenFuel Wellness Partner—Income Opportunity Overview.”
Ah. It’s all clicking now. I’m not on a date; this is a multilevel marketing presentation.
I’ve heard about this happening—MLMers using dating sites to find potential people to add to their downline—but this is a first for me.
“Is this a business presentation?” I ask him, even though it clearly is.
He gives me a big smile. “It’s more of an introduction to a ground-floor opportunity. ZenFuel has only been—”
I hold out a hand. “Let me stop you right there,” I say, cutting him off. “I’m definitely not interested.”
Luke gives me a little curious smirk as he passes by, cup in hand. He walks over to the other side of the coffee shop and takes a seat facing me, like he’s ready to watcha show.
“Really?” Bryce asks, as if this is the most shocking thing he’s ever heard. “You don’t want to know how you can easily hit your health goals by just taking one little pill?”
One little pill? Interesting . . . No, hold on, Claire. This is a scam. It’s never that easy.
“No, I don’t,” I say, shaking my head.
“Well, that’s too bad,” Bryce says, the crinkling around his eyes long gone. “I see this was a waste of time.”
“I’m afraid it was,” I say. I feel like I should say something about how tacky it is to use dating apps to recruit for your pyramid scheme, but honestly I don’t have the energy. But I will be reporting his profile.
He stands up and haphazardly shoves the papers back into his briefcase. He reaches in his pocket and sets a business card down on the table. “If you change your mind, give me a call.”
I only give him a closed-mouth smile in response, and he stalks away and out the door.
“What was that about?” Luke asks from across the coffee shop once the door is shut. He gets up from his table and walks over to mine, taking Bryce’s empty seat without asking. Typical.
“I believe I was just asked to join an MLM,” I say.
“And did you?” he asks, with a questioning look.
“I’m considering it. It’s a ground-floor opportunity.”
He snorts out a laugh. “You should definitely get in on that, Arch.”
He settles into the chair as if he belongs there, which is so Luke. Right now I’m somewhere between admiring it and finding it insufferable.
“Where did you find that guy?”
“A dating site,” I say.
Luke’s eyebrows shoot up. “That’s a thing? MLM guys on dating sites?”
“It’s a first for me,” I tell him.
He chuckles. “That’s a lot of nerve. It’s almost impressive.”
“Right?”
“Do you do a lot of online dating?” he asks.
