I scooped her hair off her shoulders, sliding it behind her back. “The Warriors are arguably the best team in the world, baby. I’ve trained with them, but I never dreamed…” I shook my head. “When we met, I was returning home from training with them. That’s how I know this is kismet. It’s all connected.”
Her crinkled brow dropped low. “The Warriors are a team in New Zealand?”
“Yes, baby.” I chuckled at how cute she was. She really knew nothing aboutsportsball. I’d get her there, though. A year as a WAG, and she’d be an expert. “They’retheteam in New Zealand, and their roster has an opening just my size.”
“What about the Mountain Lions?”
“I love my team, and I’ll be sad to move on, but this…” I shook my head, “this’ll be the pinnacle of my career. What a way to go out.”
I saw it all in my head. One or two more brilliant seasons with the best players and franchise in the world. I’d be able to walk away from this part of my life knowing I’d lived it to the fullest. Ifit all had to come to an end—and it did, unfortunately—this was how I wanted it to happen.
She swallowed so hard, it was audible. “So you’ve made up your mind? You’re going?”
I pulled back, my eyes darting between hers. Her mouth was curving and falling, again and again, like she was trying to be happy, but it wasn’t happening. Seeing her this way made it dawn on me how stupid I was. I hadn’t said the most important part.
“We’regoing. You, me, and Kat. The team will line up a house for us, and the other wives can help us pick a school for Kat. She’s going to love it over there.” I cupped the side of her neck. “I know your first experience in New Zealand didn’t go well, so I’m going to make it up to you. We’ll have time to travel, see the country, really soak it in together. You won’t want to come home when the season’s over.”
“Ben…” She pushed me back and slid off the stool. “I can’t move to another country.”
I watched her retreat from me, confused. “What?”
“Are you really surprised?” She pressed her hands to her abdomen. “I’m in the middle of law school and have a really great job. I can’t just…I guess you expect me to quit all of it?”
“No.No.” I shook my head hard. “You don’t have to quit. Well, the job, yeah, but you can find one there if you want to keep working. Or get a new one when you get back. And law school…I don’t know how that works. Maybe you can do online courses, or pick it back up when we come back. It’s a year—two tops. Not much in the grand scheme of things, and I promise, baby, you’ll love it there. It’ll be so damn peaceful.”
“You’ve got this all figured out.” She walked to the other side of the room then spun around. “I’m sorry, Ben. I can’t drop everything to follow you to the other side of the world after only a few months together. Your career is important, but so is mine.I’ve worked too hard to get where I am and build something to call my own to give it all up with absolutely no backup plan.”
This wasn’t what I’d been expecting at all. But maybe she wasn’t getting it. It was a surprise after all. She probably needed time to come around. Not much, since we needed to be on a plane in a few weeks, but we had all night to talk.
“I’m not asking you to drop anything, Mazz. I admire how hard you’ve worked, and I know family law is important to you. I get it. But why not take a year or two off? I’ll take care of everything, and you can relax for once.”
“Ben.” She breathed my name like it was the saddest in the world. “I love you very much, but I’m not going to New Zealand with you.”
“Don’t say that with such finality. We haven’t even talked about it.” I crossed the room to her, taking her hands in mine. “Just listen. Let’s sit down, look at houses and schools. Let’s figure this out.”
The look she pinned me with cut all the way to the bone. “Let’s talk about your mom.”
I reared back, releasing her hands. “That has nothing to do with this.”
“I think it does.”
Now I was starting to get mad, and I did not want to be mad at her. “I know you don’t have a lot of respect for what I do, butpleasetry to understand the kind of opportunity I’m being offered.”
She flinched like I’d struck her. “I have a lot of respect for your career, Ben. Since we reunited, I’ve watched every single one of your games. I celebrate every win, stress over every hit. It’s new to me, but I care, and I think I’ve more than proven that. That was really unfair.”
“You’re right. I’m sorry.” I dragged my fingers through my hair, searching for a way to make her understand. “I feel likeyou’re not hearing me, though. Wanting to join the Warriors has nothing to do with my mother and everything to do with playing rugby in New Zealand for the best team on earth. Besides that, it’s a beautiful place to live with a high quality of life. We’ll be happy there, baby. You have to try.”
“And you’re not hearing me. If you need this, we’ll try to make it work. I’ll bring Katty to visit. We can do video calls, talk as much as possible. We’ll miss you, but a year, two tops, isn’t so long in the grand scheme of things.”
Hearing my words thrown back at me with her absolute refusal to back down made my vision blur and panic strike at my chest. I clutched my pounding heart, keeping it from leaping out and cracking on the floor.
“Why do you get to decide?” I uttered lowly.
Her arms jerked. “What do you mean?”
“You don’t want to go with me, all right. That’s your choice. But why do you get to decide where Katty goes? I want her with me, Mazz. I’ve missed too much time with my daughter to settle for visits and phone calls. I’m not leaving her behind.”
The air went still.
