And judging from the severity in his eyes, we were just getting started.
“If any chosen Shadowborn fails the training or refuses the call,” he went on, “the current servant of Death is permanently bound and forced to serve for eternity. It is the risk we take when we make our selection, but I never considered it a risk. As I said, no one has ever refused before.”
“Yet here I go, breaking all the rules again.” I offered him a small smile and reached out to squeeze his knee. I was pissed at him for keeping me in the dark on this—it was a major revelation, to say the least, and I’d need time to fully process it later, and ask more questions and probably ignore him for a few days—but in the grand scheme of our current predicament, and everything that still waited for us on the material plane, Liam’s sins of omission weren’t exactly unforgivable. I had bigger battles to fight, and I was counting on Liam to stand by my side through all of them.
Besides, he’d picked me, and I’d refused. Now, he’d be stuck as the Grim Reaper for all eternity. That sounded like punishment enough.
But Liam didn’t return my smile. His gaze darkened, his brow creasing with deep lines. “Yours was not a refusal as much as a… well, a different sort of complication”
“What sort of—oh.”Damn. Of course.The labyrinth of this insane tale just branched out in a thousand new directions. “Because of Sebastian. My contract.”
“I named you as my successor, unaware of your existing bond. Regardless of the strength of your power or whatever greatness I believed you capable of, as a demon sworn witch, your soul was already claimed. I couldn’t move forward without the permission of your master.”
The sound of the m-word word made my skin crawl with revulsion. Liam had the grace to look embarrassed, but it was too late.
“So you made a deal,” I snapped, getting to my feet. This was his true confession—the real source of his guilt. I turned away from him and knelt on the foredeck, gazing out across the endless black mirror beneath us, shaking my head in disbelief.
Fucking Sebastian. Whatwasit about him? Why did the men I cared most about always turn to him when the chips were down?
“You made a deal,” I repeated. “With the Prince of Hell.”
“At the time,” he said softly, “I thought—”
“Yes, I know, Liam. You thought it was the only option at the time. You and everyone else who’s ever signed on Sebastian’s dotted line. That’s why they call it a devil’s bargain.” I rubbed my temples, a new headache squeezing my skull like an overripe melon. I could forgive Liam for not telling me about the Death thing. But making a deal with the Prince of Hell? After everything I’d been through on that front with Ronan? “Just tell me what happened.”
“Well, Sebastian heard my case, of course. He already knew how powerful you were—how powerful you were destined to become. And just as I’d bargained on you accepting the mantle, Sebastian had bargained on your refusal.”
“Oh, I’m sure he did.” I couldn’t keep the sarcasm from my voice. “And the terms of this clandestine deal of the century?”
“For a small price, he agreed to grant me the opportunity to assess your magic, train you to the fullest extent that time allowed, and ultimately present this choice to you as I was meant to. If you accepted the honor, you would continue on in my stead, and I would be free to live out a mortal life, just as I’d planned.”
Wow.So that’s what all this had been about. Liam wanted his mortality, and he was willing to trade away mine for the privilege.
“And this so-called small price?” I asked.
“I was to bring him the soul of a woman who broke her contract years ago, and has eluded his capture ever since.”
“Bring him the soul? How?”
“I would’ve had to take her life, Gray.” He let out a deep sigh. “I’m not proud of that now. Please understand—when I made that deal, I did not think and feel as a human.”
“No, that didn’t happen until you became Liam Colebrook, surfing philosopher, giver of advice and spreader of knowledge, Mr. Humanity himself. Right?”
“Not… quite. It is only in your eyes that I see my human reflection. You look at me as if you truly believe I could be human. As if you truly believe I could be loved.”
I didn’t respond, and after a few moments of chilling silence, Liam said softly, “It’s what I thought I wanted at the time, Gray. My soul was ready to move on.”
“And now?” I asked, my own voice just as soft. Just as broken. I was still kneeling on the foredeck, and I couldn’t bring myself to turn around and look at him. I was too afraid of what he might say. “Is that still what you want?”
“It doesn’t matter. It’s not possible now.”
“But if itwere, Liam. Would you want that? A mortal life?”
Liam didn’t say anything for so long, I thought he’d vanished. That I’d only been imagining the feel of his heat cresting behind me, the imprint of his presence refusing to fade from my memory.
But when I finally found the courage to get back on my feet and turn around, he was standing right before me, solid and real, closing the small distance that remained. Fresh tears shone in his eyes.
“I did want that, yes,” he admitted, resting his hands on my shoulders. “And I kept on wanting it, right up until—”
