“Pray do not underestimate the depths of my affection. Surely, you must have recognized my growing esteem for you these past weeks. Did I contemplate your family’s circumstances before asking you? Of course I did. But the only person who matters to me in this decision is you.”
“My parents must have been fond of each other when they married, but now my mother whinges about her nerves, and my father hides in his book room. They rarely have a word to say to each other, and I could never go willingly into such a marriage.”
Darcy had been so certain Elizabeth wished for his proposal. “Do you not trust my love for you?”
“I do trust you, but I must have time to think. My headache has returned, and I cannot continue this conversation. I beg you, sir, to be patient.”
Darcy made his way back to Rosings.She never said she did not love me.That she feared the disparity between their families and how the ton would react to their marriage made him wonder how long she had been expecting his proposal.
Elizabeth Bennet was the woman he wanted to marry, and, regardless of anyone else’s opinion, he would marry her. I love her too much to let her go.His aunt and uncle would be forced to embrace his wife, simply to show family unity.She said she trusts me, so I must believe all will be well.Darcy imaginedbeing married to Elizabeth and realised he still grinned as he entered his aunt’s drawing room.
Lady Catherine shrieked, “Darcy! Where have you been?”
If she only knew.
“Richard has been recounting the ridiculous behaviour of the recruits he is training.”
Elizabeth hurried up the stairs to be alone; her nerves settled in the quiet of her chambers. She picked up the book she had left beside the bed, but try as she might, she was unable to concentrate on the words before her. Her thoughts were consumed by what had just transpired in Charlotte’s sitting room.He is so tall, so handsome, and more intelligent than my father. How is it that MrDarcy has come to propose to me? Have I misjudged the sincerity of his affection? Why am I so afraid to admit how much I care for him? I have come to admire him these past weeks in Hunsford, but is it enough? Is my hesitation to acknowledge my true emotions due to my initially injured pride or solely fear for my future?
Finally, Elizabeth found sleep, but sometime in the middle of the night, she sat bolt upright.I love him, I do, but I am so afraid we will not be happy together. It would be better for him if he married a woman with a large dowry and the right connexions.
Shortly after the sun rose, Elizabeth donned her yellow sprigged muslin and hurried to meet MrDarcy. She found him leaning against a tall oak tree, fidgeting with his gloves. “Good morning, sir.” She smiled
“And a very good morning to you. Is there something you wish to tell me?”
Elizabeth gazed into his eyes and saw only tenderness. “I have no idea what you mean.” She tapped her finger on her chin playfully.
“Do you have an answer to the question I asked you last night?”
She looked off into the distance before replying. “Not yet—it is an important decision that will affect the rest of our lives.”
“May I ask why you are hesitating?
She paused before responding. “I am afraid that marrying you would lead to your discontent.”
“Discontent? Why?”
“As soon as you realise I have failed to live up to the expectations you have for your wife and mistress of your homes, you will be miserable. I fear your disdain for me would lead me to overwhelming despair. I spoke last night of my parents’ unequal marriage and I will not do something that might make us both terribly unhappy.”
He tucked her hand in his arm as they began to walk. “I could dismiss your fears and say that your doubts are unfounded, but I understand your hesitancy and would not wish you to accept me if you were not certain. I assure you I have never had a moment’s interest in any of those so-called proficient young women of the ton.”
They had taken but a few steps when Elizabeth’s boot slipped on a patch of mud. Darcy caught her before she could fall, but lost his own balance in the action, sending them both spinning—until they collapsed to the ground in laughter.
“Oh, no. My pretty yellow muslin!”
Darcy wiped a spot of dirt from her cheek, grinning, as he helped her gain her feet.
“I must make sure to change before MrCollins sees me. He already believes I am positively medieval,” she said, wiping her grimy hands on her already soiled skirts as the usually fastidiousMrDarcy brushed the dirt from his own breeches. “I suppose we should not tell anyone how we came to be in this situation.”
“When you do accept me, I pray you will not wish for a long engagement,” he said as they turned back to the parsonage.
She quirked her eyebrow. “Are you not assuming too much, sir?”
“I am hopeful—allow me to reassure you that I foresee nothing but a beautiful life for us as man and wife. Once we are betrothed, do you wish to wait to marry?”
“Indeed not—if weareto be wed, I will allow my mother just enough time to plan a celebratory breakfast worthy of the master of Pemberley!”
“And its future mistress.”
