“Sorry. You must think I’m crazy.” She turned her head in his direction, but he couldn’t take his eyes off her anyway.
He was interested in merely watching her catch her next breath, grateful for it because he didn’t think he would ever see it again.
“Nah. Not at all.”
“Is Inari outside the door?” Ayla swallowed and lowered the mug into her lap.
“Not at the moment. She’s making breakfast.”
“Oh, Lord. That’s never a good sign,” Ayla drawled, making Kong chuckle.
She was still reserved, a little shell shocked, but she was Ayla underneath all that. Sweet, sarcastic, and warm.
“What’s been going on around here?”
“We can talk about that later. I want to know what happened to you.”
The minute the question left his lips, Kong regretted it. He caught the panic flickering through her eyes. She looked away and then down into her mug briefly before clearing her throat.
“No, you don’t,” she responded.
He grabbed her chin and forced her to look him in the eye. Kong didn’t want to take it there with her so soon, but he had to know. For four months, she’d been away from him, and that was a lot of time for someone to have the kind of power over her that he saw.
“Tell me,” Kong urged her.
Pain flickered in her stare. The kind that caused lifetime damage. He’d seen it before, in the faces of those other girls they came across in the fourplex months ago. Lost. Damaged. Broken down into submission. It gutted him to think she’d become one of them.
“Which part?” she whispered.
“All of it.”
Ayla pushed out a breath, rattling both lips as she removed the covers from her legs and tossed them over the side of the bed. She’d felt so weak in the last few months. One good night’s rest in her old bedroom had somehow revived her, like her ancestors had come through in the middle of the night with some healing for her. Mind, body, and spirit.
“I didn’t know I was pregnant.” She cleared her throat and moved toward the windows. “I ignored all the signs. Put everyone before me, and tried to keep myself busy, so I didn’t have to think about you or us. That was… hard,” she recalled, nodding. “When I found out right before the trip to Hawaii, I thought about running away. I was too far along to abort. I hate I even had that thought.” She lowered her eyes to the ground, and tears filled them to the brim. “I wanted him more than I could ever imagine. When I started to feel him move, nothing else mattered.” She sniffled and squinted, peering outside her window as some kids raced their bikes in the middle of the street outside their home.
Kong listened. Patient. Hands clasped together, giving her the time she needed to work through her thoughts. His chest tightened when she cried.
“When you called that night… I can still hear your voice.” Ayla smiled to herself. “I decided I was going to tell you. We would figure it out. How could I not give that to my child? Or you.” She finally faced him. “Nari told me from jump I needed to tell you, but I was scared. I was wrong. I should have been honest. I let the hurt also cloud my judgment. I didn’t want you leaving Nayelli because you felt obligated to me.”
All of it made sense, and he believed her. He just wished he could turn back the hands of time. For both of them.
“I was so scared. I didn’t think I would ever get out of that place. Mira took care of me while I was pregnant. She told me she had faked the explosion and that everyone thought I was dead, so no one would come looking for me.” She whimpered. “I believed her. When I gave birth, they drugged me up so bad. I could hear him crying.” Her chest cracked, and she finally broke.
The wounded cries that came out of her both angered and pained Kong as he stepped off the bed so he could go to her.
“She said that he died! That he was gone! She lied, Kong! I know it!” Rejecting his comfort, she brought her angered, wet eyes to his.
A fury he’d never seen burned behind them.
“If you believe that, I believe it.” He grabbed her and pulled her into his arms.
She wept into his chest until she had nothing left to give. Wiping her cheeks, she pulled away and peered up into his broken face. He was as handsome as she remembered, but she could tell that he’d been through it the last few months, much like she had. There was something hardened behind his gaze now. Although she hated that it happened, she was glad to know he’d been just as tormented as she was.
“I’m pretty sure I look a mess.” She tried to pull away, suddenly self-conscious.
She hadn’t been able to look into a mirror in a long time. Last night before she showered and washed her hair, she caught a glimpse of herself, and it was not pretty. The only time Mira let them get all dolled up was when it was time to make money. Otherwise, she had them living like animals until they learned to ‘play by her rules,’ as she would say. No back talk, no trying to escape, no thinking you’re bigger than the program. Some girls had all kinds of freedom; those were the ones she often had to watch out for. Kong didn’t release her arm, but he saw her mind spiraling as her eyes darted around anxiously. He pulled her closer, shaking his head slowly and cupping her cheek.
“Still the prettiest,” he said, making her blush.
