"Connor, please…something has to change.” His voice wavers, any ability he might have had to keep his distress contained becoming harder and harder the longer this goes on. “We had Tony ready to send out a search party. He even got his brothers involved."
His brothers?
I raise a brow. "They're back?"
Though Tony's two younger brothers grew up with us on the mountain, they both left for military service the same way the oldest Briggs brother did as soon as they hit eighteen. And while Tony has been back in town for over five years already, they haven’t been here for anything for quite some time.
And I welcome the change of topic…
Liam nods. "From what I understand, Tripp was medically discharged and has been in some sort of rehab."
"What about Barrett?"
I catch the flash of unease in his eyes as he shakes his head. "I don't know what's up with him."
Does anyone?
Barrett has always been the loose cannon of the Briggs family, and I was equally surprised, and not, that he ended up special ops. He's just the kind of intense, regimented, and slightly unhinged they look for.
The brothers being back will certainly make McBride Mountain more interesting and maybe take a bit of the spotlight off me. Give the town something else to gossip about for the first time in months.
"Huh. Well, I'm glad they’re back, and that you didn't send out the search party."
Shit.
Before the words even leave my mouth, I know I shouldn’t have tacked on that last part because it just reopens the door I had hoped we closed.
“Maybe we should have.” Liam’s eyes narrow on me again, and Giz lifts his head and looks at me as if he, too, needs to examine me more closely and judge. “You don't look good, bro."
"Gee, thanks."
He shrugs. "You want me to lie about it?”
“Wouldn’t fucking hurt…”
Liam releases a sigh, returning to petting Gizmo who has snuggled back on his lap, still eyeing me warily. "You need to talk to someone."
"What, like a fucking shrink?" I shake my head, the annoyance I’ve tried so hard to keep at bay where he’s concerned now returning. "No.”
Hell no.
The last thing I need is someone rattling around in my head and trying to rationalize thoughts and feelings they can’t possibly understand because they weren’t there. They weren’t the one who pulled the trigger over and over. They didn’t drive an axe into a man’s head.
“I don't care if it's a goddamn doctor or if it's Elaine or Claire or some tourist you meet at the bar and bring home to your cabin for a one-night stand, but you have to talk to someone."
"What good is that going to do?"
He sets Gizmo on the floor and pushes to his feet, making his way over to me and settling on the edge of the desk. "All I know is that my head was a very dark place to be for a very long time. I don't want that for you. I can't stand to see you spiraling the same way I did."
"I'm not spiraling."
At least, not admittedly.
Liam snorts. "Oh yeah? Stalking off into the woods in the middle of the night with nothing but your axe and a bottle of bourbon and not coming back for a week sounds like completely emotionally stable behavior."
I scowl at him.
But I can’t really argue against his point.
