James was literally my best friend, my only friend. That was kind of a pathetic realization. My only friend was some random guy I wrote letters to in prison.It was the lowest-pressure relationship on the planet, and I still ended up botching it. I’d lied to him all this time, and now he was getting out of prison and expected us to… I don’t know, be together?
It might make me a terrible person, but part of me wished James was serving a life sentence, like I’d told everyone in my life that he was. David knew I had a pen pal, but he thought it was an old guy, a lifer. Were that actually true, I could at least still have him and my cozy little fantasies of us being together while I lived my shitty real life. I was inevitably going to lose the only thing I actually enjoyed.
Once I told James the truth, he’d never want to see or talk to me again. And even if he did, David would have an aneurysm. He didn’t even like it when a stranger smiled at me. He was constantly worried that I’d cheat on him, and I guess, to be fair, I technically had. I’d never been physically intimate with anyone else since we’d been together, but those letters would definitely be consideredoutsidethe boundaries of mine and David’s relationship. I knew that, which is why I lied. And why I’d kept the letters coming to my parents’ house instead of the apartment David and I shared.
When our letters started becoming more personal was about the time I was introduced to David. I was hopeful in the beginning, and figured I would learn to love David. My parents, especially my father, liked him so much that I just accepted the fact that he was supposed to be there. But it’d never been great.
Our sex was good, even if he normally only wanted it after he’d been drinking. There’d been a thousand times I’d thought that he didn’t actually want to be with me, but liked being close to my father. For my part, I don’t actually know why I stayed. Guilt? Shame? Parental approval? David hadn't started getting rough with me until six or seven months ago. Sometimes he grabbed a little hard when he was really angry. I sometimes thought he was starting to suspect how I really felt about him.
I could blame my current situation on a million things, but when push came to shove, I was an adult and responsible for my own actions and decisions. Despite the feeling like I woke up in this life one day and had no clue how I ended up there, the fact remained that I continued to let it happen.
Why?
I had a loose exit plan if shit really hit the fan, or if, by some miracle, James actually did love me, but it would mean losing my family, too. My parents would never forgive me for running out on David for a convict.
“You’re all set.”
He startled me out of my thoughts, and he lunged forward to steady me as I nearly dumped myself off the stool I was sitting on into the floor.
I got to my feet with his hand on my shoulder. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to scare you…again.”
He chuckled. “You’re like a cat.”
“Sorry, I just get lost in my head sometimes.”
JR smiled and looked away. “Look Avery I was wondering if-”
“What do I owe you for the oil change?” I interrupted him, too nervous to let him finish his sentence.
“Oh, uh. Don’t worry about it. I wanted to tell you…”
“No, I can’t do that. You worked late and spent like two hours fixing my car.”
Fuck, why am I sweating?
“It was only an hour, and I wanted to do it. I’ve been wanting to talk to you…”
I pulled my wallet out of my back pocket. “I can pay, I’m not poor or anything.” I took a step forward and held two twenties out towards him.
“Avery, I don't want your money,” he protested.
“Then, what do you want?”
He took a swift step forward, closing the distance between us. In an instant, his calloused hand found the side of my face, and he tilted my head upwards as he covered my lips with his own.
It was like every muscle in my body relaxed simultaneously, and I completely melted into his arms as my lips parted, and his tongue swept into my mouth. Imoaned against his lips and looped my arms around his neck. He pulled me in tighter against himself. He kissed me again and again until I was drunk on the taste of his mouth.
Feeling his erection grind against me through his jeans was like a bucket of icy water being dumped over my head. I pulled back, and he groaned and chased my lips for a split second before he opened his eyes.
I must have had a panicked look on my face because he immediately took a step back. “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have…”
Without letting him finish I just hurried over to my car and started the engine.
“Avery…”
I heard his muffled voice through the closed car window, but I ignored him. I put the car in reverse and screeched the tires to get out of there. I got turned around and sped out of the parking lot as I watched him jog out of the garage in the rearview mirror.
“Fuck!”
