“What’re we going to do?”
“I don’t know. If we can’t think of anything, we could always go help with the cleanup from Pride. The streets are pretty messy and they’re asking for volunteers to help pick up the debris.” He smiled. “It’s hardly exciting. If you have something else in mind, that’s cool.”
“No.” Patrick crawled off the bed. “We should help.”
“Great. Have you had lunch yet?”
“No.”
“Me, neither. We’ll grab a pizza on the way. I’m starving.”
Less than an hour later, having consumed a few slices of pizza, they were on the street with garbage bags and grabber sticks.
“Why won’t you tell me what’s wrong?” Brian paused as he stuffed a piece of trash in his bag. “You’re acting strange. Tell me what’s going on.”
Patrick felt bad for hiding his dilemma from Brian. Maybe the fact that he didn’t want to hear what Brian would say—meant heneededto hear it. He released a long, slow breath. “Derek called.”
“What?” Brian looked shocked. “I thought you were sure he wouldn’t.”
“I was. I didn’t expect him to call.”
Brian frowned. “What did he say? Did he officially call off the date?”
Clearing his throat, Patrick absently plucked at a piece of trash on the ground. “Not… not exactly.”
“Whatexactlydid he say?”
Patrick didn’t answer.
“Patrick…” Brian ceased working. “Are… Are yougoing outwith him?”
“I didn’t say that,” Patrick mumbled, avoiding eye contact.
“You didn’t not say it, either. What’s going on?”
“He…” Patrick cast a tentative look at his friend. “He told me where he’d be this evening and left it up to me to decide if I wanted to join him.”
“But you’renot,right?” When he didn’t answer, Brian pressed, “Right,Patrick?”
Patrick dropped his eyes to the pavement and shrugged. “I-I don’t know. I mean, it’s just… it’s just dinner… in a public place.”
“Patrick, don’t,” Brian pleaded softly. “You’re playing with fire. This guy doesn’t have the same moral priorities as us. And even if he’s basically a nice guy, he’ll eventually want things from you that you can’t give him. Or shouldn’t, anyway.”
“I’m not going to… have sex with him,” Patrick whispered. “I know that would be wrong.”
“Why go out with him at all, then?”
“I don’t know… I like him. And… and besides, I never said for sure that I was.” He moved forward, resuming cleanup.
Brian joined him. “I’m sorry. I know you’re a smart guy and can make your own decisions. I just don’t want you to get hurt or do something you’ll regret. You have no idea how fast things can escalate out of control.”
“And you do?”
Brian kept quiet and picked up trash in silence.
“Brian?”
He halted, his head down. “I do, actually.” He raised his eyes and despair reflected back at Patrick. “I met someone a couple years ago. He was a Christian but not aSide BChristian. He respected my beliefs, at first, but then he started wanting more… a little at a time; holding hands, then kissing, then…”
