Daughters, they make it look easy,she thought.
But then the shadow that was Ceri surged for the outline that was Al, and Adeline abandoned any attempt at creeping away in favour of retreating as quickly as she could. Too quickly. The scuffle of her slippers on the stone was met with a sharp inhale, and she winced, freezing once more.
Bollocks.
“... Kai?” said Ceri tentatively, Alun swearing beneath his breath.
She swivelled on the spot, gut tightening guiltily when she found Ceri hurrying forth from the shadows, eyes round and tense, Alun at her heels.
“Nope,” she said, as they drew up short before her. The word came out with an awkwardly brightpopand an even more awkward wave. “Just me. Sorry.”
They stared at her.
“I was just …” She faltered. Gave up. “My room is that way, so—erm.”
She edged around them, but Ceri turned with her, reaching out to touch her arm in a gentle request.Wait,said that brief touch. So Adeline waited, little though she wanted to.
“Did you … hear any of that?”
She bit back a wince, and judging by Ceri’s face, that was answer enough.
“More than I should have,” she admitted all the same.
Ceri wrung her hands. “Are you going to tell Kai?”
“Weshould tell Kai,” Alun grumbled.
Adeline felt the awkward tightness in her chest drop like snow off a sagging branch, unwanted weight swept away on a gust of relief. Relief that this was not some secret she’d stumbled upon, that theydidplan to tell their king. His friend, whom he loved and trusted, and the sister he’d always fought so hard to protect. Two-thirds of his small court; she understood why they’d hesitate, but—
“You should,” she said, and then at the sharp pitch of Ceri’s brow, she hurried to add, “I’m sorry, I know it’s not my place, but youshouldtell him. I hate to keep anything from him, and the way you both feel isfarfrom subtle—”
Ceri stopped twisting at her hands and froze with both of them folded before her. Even in the dark, her face was a mask of disbelief that piled that cold weight upon Adeline’s chest once more. When she spoke, her voice was thrumming; dark.
“And you’ve told him howyoufeel?”
“Ceri,” Al murmured, but she shrugged him off.
“No. I don’t pretend to know what happened between you and my brother; I understand that it’s complicated,” she seethed. “So is this. Youknowhe wraps me in cotton, and you know why. You think we owe it to him to tell him something we havejustfigured out for ourselves? What about whatyouowe him? I see the way he looks at you, Adeline. He’s happier than he’s ever been, and yet itbreaks his heart. Why is that?”
The snow was piling, and Adeline could not breathe.
“Ceri, stop,” Alun said again, a hand tentatively curling at her shoulder. He shot Adeline a look that was part panic and part apology, brows sloping in time with his helpless shrug. “Look, it’s been a difficult night, and we’re all upset. She doesn’t mean—”
Ceri rounded on him.
“Donotspeak for me,” she snapped, but her voice had gone thick and watery. Shewasupset, and she had been so happy just moments ago. A brief bubble of bliss after yet another terrible ordeal, until Adeline had stumbled in and popped it. She didn’t want to be the reason they fought after what they’d just admitted to one another; didn’t want to break another tender Cumhaill heart.
“You’re right,” Adeline blurted.
It had the desired effect of turning Ceri’s attention.
“I haven’t told him how I feel, because—” Her chest stuttered, a painful warning in the burning catch of her breath. Not that part, then. “It doesn’t matter why. I’m in love with him.”
The hallway fell silent; quiet enough for Adeline to hear the gallop of her own heart beneath all that weight, set to beat rightout of her chest and race off down the hallway. It hurt, every pulse a strike against her heavy ribs. Ceriwyn was staring at her, and she did not know what to do other than hug her arms around herself and try to contain the ache.
It was the first time she’d said it aloud. Every rhythmic slam of her blood was a protest in her own veins. Whether because she’d said it atallor because she hadn’t said it to Kai, she didn’t know. She said it again anyway, just to prove to herself that she could.
“I love him.”
