“Jag, what do you say we go outside and play?” His eyes light up as he rushes into his jacket and rushes to the backdoor. As I have taught him over the years, he stops at the backdoor and waits for us to reach it as I open it and he runs out.
Once we are outside, he rushes to play as Ash and I sit down at the table. “El, it’s not good.” He looks up at me and I can see a hint of water in his eyes. “They say he needs a transplant, but he doesn’t want to get one.” He tells me.
“That doesn’t surprise me.” I roll my eyes as we both laugh, and I glance over to check on Jag. “How long do they think he has?”
“A year, maybe 2.” He whispers out as he looks over and looks at Jag.
“Shit,” I mutter as I sigh, and when I look back up, Ash is still staring across the yard.
“Did you tell him?” He nods toward Jag, playing.
“Huh? Who?” I ask, trying to evade the question, but Ash slowly looks at me and laughs.
“El, I may be a little oblivious at times, but I’m not stupid. Come on, he’s like a carbon fucking copy.” He laughs before he grows serious for a second, “if he knew this whole time and let you—,”
Cutting him off I start, “Fuck Ash, do you really think if I would have told him he would have let me stay away for this long? I mean, you know him better than I do.” I shrug, not really answering the question. Mostly, so I can still protect him. All this time, and I’m still worried about how they will react to him.
“This is why you left.” He states as he stares at me.
“No, this is why I stayed away.” I correct him and he nods his head. “Everyone would have blamed him. It was already tense enough when I left.” I whisper almost low enough for him not to hear and I think for a moment that he might not have, but when I glance up to him, I see the hurt on his face, and I realize he had.
He says nothing for a few minutes until. “So, do you want to leave tonight or first thing in the morning?”
“What?” I instantly panic. “Ash, I’m not going—,” but he stops me.
“El, Oz is sick. If you don’t go back now, you will hate yourself.” He stops. “And you have a choice to make. Either you tell him or expect him on your porch by the end of the week.” He looks at me and I’m about to argue with him about it, but his phone rings, cutting me off. As he glances down at it, he smirks. I can tell by his smirk that it’s Caroline as he answers it. “Hey, Red.” He mutters into the phone, and it makes me shake my head. He glances over at me as he says, “Yeah…. I will.” He pauses as he smiles and turns to look out again. “Tell them, I miss them too.” He mutters and I realize why he’s so adamant about me telling Axe now, because since I saw him last, he has now become a father. “I’ll be home soon. I love you, too.”
“What happened to you?” I laugh out as I just shake my head at him, and he laughs as well.
“That woman.” He mirrors my head shake before he stops and looks down, then back over at me. “He’s been different since you left.” He tells me honestly.
“It doesn’t matter.” I shake my head. “He decided.”
“El, you know that’s not fair. Had he known…” he pauses.
“That’s the thing, though. I don’t want to be picked first because of obligation.”
“Where are we going?” Jag asks me as Ash grabs the bags and takes them to the SUV.
Sighing, I kneel, looking to my son, “We’re going to go see my dad…” I trail as I see his eyes light up, “Your grandpa.”
“My grandpa?” I smile at him as I nod. “Like Billy’s grandpa?”
“Well, not exactly like Billy’s…” I trail, thinking about my life growing up around the MC, but from talking with Ash last night I have been able to gather that at least now there would be other kids there for Jagger to play with. Unlike when I grew up, and it was just me… and Ash watching over me until dad got out of prison and moved us to the desert.”
“Alright, little bro,” Ash says as he walks back in, “are we ready to go?” Jag looks up to me as I nod my head, picking him up before I walk him out to the truck.
“It can’t be easy.” He says to me, as we make our way through the desert. After I glance back and see Jag is fast asleep.
“I don’t think it’s ever easy.” I shrug back at him.
“Yeah, there’s two of us and…” he just shakes his head, eyes widening. I understand what he’s saying. It’s fucking difficult.
“Yeah, but there’s also two of them.” He laughs. “Did you tell Caroline already?” I nod back towards Jag. Knowing I’m going to get an earful from her.
“No,” he shakes his head, causing me to look over at him for a second. “She can’t keep a secret, right now and he needs to hear it from you.” I laugh because I’m curious if she has picked up on Jag’s existence. I mean, I haven’t exactly been doing very well at keeping it a secret, but she has been so busy with the boys that I don’t think she’s caught any slip-ups that I’ve had.
“Caroline?” I laugh out loud. “The woman who knew something about what was going on for 6 months and didn’t even tell you?”
