Chapter Thirty-One
APOLLO
Like a puppy excited to see his human after a long day, I rush to the door to greet Lily when I hear her come in.
But I stop dead in my tracks, when, once again, she greets me with teary eyes. And again, I’m frozen to my spot, when I move in to comfort her and she says those four words invented to break hearts, “We need to talk.”
Lily steps around me and walks to the kitchen where she sits in her usual spot at the table. With her hands folded on the Formica top, she waits for me to join her sitting around the corner of the table next to her before she stoically informs me, “I saw that reporter at Dickie’s.”
“That fucking prick. I swear, I’m going to—.”
“Sit down.” Lily tugs on my arm when I get up to leave, hunt that asshole down and break every bone in his body.
“What did he say?” I ask following her pull on my wrist to sit next to her again.
“First, you need to know, he knows you’re still in Towering Pines. And after the way I acted today, he knows you’re living with me. I’m pretty sure he followed me.”
“Shit.” It’s too late. The shit storm is upon us. I waited too long to get ahead of it.
Judging by the chill surrounding her in the otherwise warm house, he already ruined her opinion of me somehow. “What did he say?” I ask again needing to know exactly what we’re dealing with, so I can set the record straight. I hope.
“You told me you changed your name,” Lily says.
“Yeah. To get a fresh start,” I say wondering why we’re going over this again.
“So…” Lily takes a deep breath. Looking at her hands clenched tightly and propped on the table in front of her, she asks, “Not to do porn?”
All the wind is punched from my lungs making it hard to speak.
“So, it’s true.” The hurt in her eyes when she turns them on me breaks my heart into a million pieces.
“No…”
“But…” She says picking up on the obvious hesitation.
“I didn’t do it. I didn’t even audition.” There’s a bit of relief in her eyes. It makes it a little easier to tell her what really happened.
“After I changed my name, I made new friends. They didn't know Apollo wasn't my real name but they gave me shit about it anyway. Joked about Apollo being a euphemism for my penis. My career was not looking good. Like I told you, I knew hard times before I got my big break. I could have made a damn good living in the porn industry or on any number of pay-to-play websites. I made the mistake of admitting to them that if the acting thing didn’t work out I’d have a career in porn.
“Not long after that, I got the audition to end all auditions. And I got the part that launched my fame over one of those, now former, friends. He leaked my plan to do porn to the press. They ran with it because it made a good story. ‘Hollywood golden boy and Porn Star?’ It’s all out there. You can look it up. But, I swear, even though I seriously considered it, I never did it. If I had, I would have told you well before we hooked up.”
“Why didn’t you tell me about it at all? You should have told me about it so I could have been ready for that guy to use it against us. I was blindsided.”
“I’m sorry, Lily. And you’re absolutely right, I should have told you. It’s weird being with someone who doesn’t know the stuff that was all over the news. I’m an arrogant, self-important prick. I default to that stuff being common knowledge to everyone. Even if I had told you, this is what it’s like to be with me. I can recount to you every minute of my life and they’ll still find something or make something up, to use against me. To hurt us. It’s what they live for. And it’s why I should leave. So you don’t get hurt by association anymore.”
I knew this was going to happen. And now that one of those assholes knows about us, they’ll all know. Lily’s name and face will be everywhere in the next hour if they're not already.
All I want is to take care of Lily but the best way to take care of her now is to distance myself from her. No matter how badly I want to stay. No matter how much I love her.
“I should probably go before they get here.” I brace myself to stand.
Lily snatches my wrist again. “Don’t.”
I freeze. I can’t even breathe as she keeps her grip firm. When she speaks, there’s no anger or frustration. It gives me hope. Maybe we can get through this.
“All this time, you and everyone else, has been telling me I need to take care of myself. I’m not great at it. But every time I’ve taken that advice, with you, my life has gotten better. Calmer. Sweeter. Fuller. I’ve gotten to spend more time with the people I care about.” She slides her grip to squeeze my hand. A swarm of butterfly wings flutters inside my stomach. I’m someone she cares about. “I can’t do things alone anymore,” she goes on. “I need to rely on other people. Ask for help. So that’s what I’m going to do now.”
She looks at me with her jaw set. Determined. “Apollo, help me. I can’t face the reporters alone anymore. At least, not without all the information to know whether or not I’m being lied to.”
My heart leaps. Hope filling every artery so full they might burst. “You want me to stay?”
“When did I ever tell you to leave?” There’s a hint of a smile in her voice. “I’m upset. There’s work to be done here. You should know, by now, I’m not afraid to get my hands dirty. I’m not afraid to do the work. Especially with someone I—.”
Lily is cut short by someone pounding on the door and incessantly ringing the doorbell.
I know that sound all too well.
They’re here.
