Her mind, ever eager to be distracted from the probable results of the review, flicked to the latest Kyle-ism.After reiterating his desire to take them on a vacation, Kyle had next offered to give them a car.
Mom had been horrified.“I won’t be bribed!”
Kyle had been patient, insisting he only wanted to do it to make sure Bella was safe.
“She’s perfectly safe as she is,” Mom had snapped.
And that had been the end of that.Which was a shame, as Gen wouldn’t mind an alternative to the rust bucket Mom was too attached to.Mom insisted her reluctance wasn’t due to offended pride but a genuine attachment to what had been the first secondhand car she’d owned, rather than the usual succession of vehicles with four or five previous owners that Gen remembered growing up.Gen wasn’t so sure.It would’ve been nice to have another option instead of the bus or the rust bucket, yet she didn’t have enough energy to argue.
But it wasn’t worth stirring the pot and fueling Mom’s rage.Gen suspected Mom’s moodiness was partly due to menopause but didn’t dare say that aloud, as she’d be sure to get her head bitten off.The Rivas women might share a lot of things but despite Gen being a doctor, Mom had always refused to get too personal, saying such things were private, so Gen hadn’t pushed.
Not that it worked the other way, of course.Mom had no issues with pushing boundaries, or getting into Gen’s face.Such as that whole issue with Bella calling Kyle “Dad.”
Why it hurt Gen she didn’t really know.Well, she did.But saying that she resented her daughter calling Kyle “Dad” felt so petty, even if it also felt like he’d barely been around long enough to deserve that title.
Mom had agreed.“He’s only been here five minutes and you let Bella call him that?”
“What was I going to do, Mom?Say no, you can’t, not until he’s been around a year?”
Mom hadn’t relented, her words seeding more of Gen’s own insecurities.For as much as Gen knew Kyle was a good man, all these little things he kept doing, he kept being, only took Bella further away from her.And if she wasn’t Bella’s mom, then who was she?
And yes, that made her selfish, but her ability to stay sanguine felt increasingly impossible, like she was struggling to keep her head above water.And depending on how this interview went, she might well drown.
The secretary nodded to Gen.“Ah, Ms.Rivas.Dr.Rialto won’t be long.”
Gen took the seat opposite, her fingers pleating her trousers.
According to the most recent email she’d received, this peer review was designed to see if the care for Lily had adhered to hospital policy and met the threshold of care demanded by Child Protective Services.And while Gen knew she had done her best, she couldn’t help but wonder if she had missed something.And the fact she hadn’t been able to discuss with her colleagues what she had done meant she was living in this void of uncertainty, wondering what her colleagues were saying behind her back.
“Ah, they’re ready for you now.”
The door opened, and she realized that instead of being a committee of three peers, this looked like it also included several board members.Oh no.She’d come prepared to discuss this professionally but also candidly in the manner she and Dr.Rialto had always managed.He’d been supportive, encouraging Dr.Singh to trust her as his 2IC.But some of the people sitting here she didn’t know.And she knew some hadnotbeen fans of hiring a fresh-faced medical graduate with a working-class background who definitely had come from the wrong side of the tracks.
“Good afternoon, Dr.Rivas.Please take a seat.”
Okay.She managed a smile and hoped she didn’t look afraid as she lowered into the plastic seat.It emitted a squeak that sounded suspiciously like something else, and she cynically wondered if they gave all their victims such a chair as a deliberate means to throw them off their game.
She lifted her chin.She wouldn’t let either an unfortunately squeaky chair or these stone-faced people intimidate her.“Hello.”
“Dr.Rivas,” Dr.Rialto began, “as you know you are here because of some questions that were raised about the care of Lily Hendrickson, particularly on the day of her last admittance.”
Lily’s last admittance.Her final admittance.She swallowed.Nodded.
What followed was a grilling asking her to recall every minute detail, and for Gen to wish she had memorized her notes.So much of what happened had been sheer instinct, was simply her moving in the rhythms of what she had always done.She couldn’t recall every single detail.
So when Mr.Atkinson, one of the board members, who seemed to be the committee chairman, asked about a particular protocol, she had to shake her head no.“I’m sorry, but I don’t recall.”
“You don’t recall, or you didn’t do it?”
“I’m sure I would have done it, because it’s something that I’ve done in the past, and my training has meant I’ve done it many times.But that precise moment has escaped my memory, so I cannot be too sure right now.”
Dr.Rialto shook his head slightly, and she realized it probably was not the best way to answer that.
“I can assure you that nobody cares more about the outcome of Lily Hendrickson’s health than I do.”Her heart panged.“Than I did.”
“Nobody is denying that, Dr.Rivas,” Mr.Atkinson continued.“But it is not just this incident that has us concerned.There have been allegations made against you that are alarming.That you’re not a team player.That you refuse to take advice.”
She shook her head.“Sir, that is not true.”
