Talk turns to Tate and Isabella's wedding plans, and my shoulders tense. They're insufferable with it. Lauren chimes in with what she wants at her wedding, which makes Max mention that he'd like a bachelor weekend that includes an artisan cigar rolling lesson. Tate nods enthusiastically. At least Damien and Kate had the decency to do something casual and quick that didn’t involve us much.
I roll my eyes. "I guess I'm going to be busy as the token bachelor party planner over the coming months," I say.
Tate, grinning like a cat that just ate a sardine, looks at Leilani and then at me. "Well, perhaps not. From the looks of things, you might be joining our ranks."
I let out a snort. "Yeah, right? Me? I'm the bachelor of the family. I'm happy just the way I am. Me and the bass boat. Doing laundry every week here at Ma and Dad's. Nah, I'm not a good catch at all."
Everyone at the table laughs with me.
I glance over at Leilani who has a smile pasted on her face. I think it's one of agreement. But I'm not entirely sure. I reach over and ruffle her hair. "Right, beautiful?"
She stares at me for a beat, then nods slowly. "That's right. We wouldn't want to disturb the confirmed bachelor in his comfortable habitat."
"Exactly," I say, getting to my feet. "Anyone want another drink?"
Truthfully, I'm already a little tipsy. But since I don't have to be anywhere, I can just crash here. Maybe Leilani can hang with me. I just want her near.
Since dinner and dessert are over, everyone gets up from the table and filters out. Tate, Isabella, and Dad go into the living room to watch some European soccer game. Max and Lauren, ever the responsible ones, clean up in the kitchen. Ma is heating up Steve's dinner in the microwave. Nat's on her phone texting someone about a jewelry show, swearing under her breath. That girl has always had a mouth like a trucker. Leilani offers to help Max and Lauren. They wave her off.
"We don't let guests do the cleaning," Max says.
I take this opportunity to grab my beer and Leilani's hand. Leading her upstairs, I take her to the second floor deck. Outside, it's hotter than blazes, a stifling, Florida summer evening. Still, the humidity feels soothing on my skin after all that tight, dry air conditioning.
"Ahhh," I sigh. "That's better. Sometimes air conditioning gets to me. I think I'm just so used to the elements from being on boats so much. I'm a wild, seafaring dude, not fit for indoor living, you know?"
Leilani looks at me with a skeptical expression. She leans on the rail and looks out at the yard, and I admire her as I come up to her from behind. She turns to face me.
"I love this little romper thing you're wearing." I tilt her face up to mine and kiss her. "I've wanted to do that all day.”
She kisses me with soft and pliant lips, and I taste the beer on my tongue and a hint of vanilla ice cream on hers. I swear, I will never tire of kissing this woman. Then she looks at me with those huge eyes.
"Well, I'm going to get going." I don’t even try to hide the shock on my face but she continues. "I've got an awful lot to dofor the bar. And I still have to make a few lists for the coming week."
I lick my lips. What? Crap. I wanted to hang out more with her tonight. I haven't gotten my Leilani fix yet. Still, I want to respect her time. Her bar is opening within a few weeks and she's probably freaking out.
"Do you want me to come home with you?" I ask. "I'm the one who's supposed to be your mentor, no matter what Max told you at dinner. We can talk about business... stuff."
She laughs softly and runs her hand through my hair, which makes my scalp tingle pleasurably. "I know you're my mentor. You've been a huge help. I'm sure Max was just trying to be helpful too. No, I should go. I need to get some sleep, and I really want to spend some time with my planner. You know how I am."
Leilani has this thing with her lists and notebooks and planners. I don't quite understand it, but admire her organizational skills. She's quite adorable when she makes those lists, fully focused, with a slight frown. I suspect that making the lists is a way to calm herself and quell her anxiety about everything she needs to do.
"Okay," I say, kissing her on the forehead and swaying a little from all the beer. "I guess I'll have to live without you for a night. It'll be hard."
She gives me a little shrug and a sad smile. "Will it though?"
We stare at each other without blinking. I think she's trying to tell me something, and I'm not entirely sure what. Maybe because I'm a little drunk, or perhaps this is one of those female cues I've never been good at reading. I blink stupidly.
In the interest of harmony, I'm just going to let it slide.
"See you later," she whispers. She brushes another kiss across my lips and murmurs something about saying goodbye to everyone else inside. Then she walks off the porch, leaving me alone in the humidity.
I sip my beer.
See, this is why I adore her, why I think our relationship is so special. She's casual and understands me. And I understand her. We're not attached at the hip, like Lauren and Max or Tate and Isabella. Leilani has her own things going on, and I respect her free time. Just as she respects mine.
We have our arrangement. Long live the arrangement.
And yet, as I stand on the porch, sipping my beer, I wonder why I feel so lonely and miserable now that she's gone.
