WhywasI so focused on fighting this? I should be rejoicing at the thought of having some time to myself. I could seek out Sir Ferro. Maybe some innocuous questions about metallurgy would help me access my magic. “Just curious.”
“One of my favorite things about you is that curiosity.” My stupid chest grew tight at that. “Today, however, it’s unnecessary for you to attend. You’ve been going to so many meetings, I’m sure you’ll enjoy a respite from the boring politics.”
I didn’t quite have the same respite in mind, but I nodded. It was nighttime, but only just… Sir Ferro was probably in the same wing of the palace. If Raphael was confident in the relaxed bond between us, then I could perhaps try any room with a beating heart.
“Of course, Iademos will be by your side for the day.”
Ogre dung. There went any chance of exploring without my wanderings being reported. We hadn’t been attacked, but that didn’t mean I would dissuade Raphael from leaving me with a guard. But did ithaveto be Demos? He hadn’t had a kind word for me in ages.
“What about Larissa?” Surely the vampiress was skilled enough for sitting around with me all day, which was what Raphael seemed to expect for me.
His brows narrowed, but it wasn’t Raphael’s voice that snapped, “She was assigned other duties.”
Great. Demos was already here. Though I found myself wondering just what duties the other soldiers might be assigned if they weren’t guarding Raphael or me.
Raphael left me to meet Demos in the living room, and I changed into a simple day dress. Wanting to avoid the awkwardness of sitting around as long as possible, I took my time. The corners of the bed could be better squared, the pillows fluffed. When the bed no longer showed any sign of this evening’s events, I found other things to straighten. My side table didn’t hold much. Raphael’s had more—rolled-up parchment, a quill, a worn book left open to a page hanging off the edge of the corner. Some coins littered the space with the haphazardness only someone with a great deal of money—and power—would dare. A microcosm of the chaos that engulfed his desk in his rooms at Damerel.
I opened the drawer under the desk. A single letter, the wax seal broken, was tucked inside.
The right thing would’ve been to leave it, to not invade his privacy. But something more was going on. He’d acted too strange on the road, and I hadn’t yet been able to understand why.
Gingerly, quietly, so as to not rustle the paper loud enough to be heard, I opened the letter.
R—
My spies have heard strange rumors—have yours told you any?
Come visit. I insist.
—J
I tucked the note back like I’d found it. So I was right, something else was amiss. The note was short and offered fewer answers than new questions. Who was J? Someone in power.Lady Jaen? She wasn’t native to the southern kingdom, but she’d clearly sought him out. Perhaps what I thought was interest in Raphael was something more.
But what spies, and what rumors? I wondered if it might be about me—how Raphael had been poisoned upon turning me. Thea had worked to keep it contained, but she was only human. She might have overlooked someone.
But then what rumors would Raphael have heard?
Having delayed as long as I could, I went back to the sitting room.
Raphael patted Demos on the shoulder with a stern look in his eye. We exchanged nods across the room, then I was left alone with Raphael’s general.
Demos stood by the door, arms crossed. His hair was tied at the nape once again, gaze stern.
For a moment, I stared at him. What if I could go see Sir Ferro? Demos would never permit it, but I could thrall him, probably. Raphael had shown me how it worked on a human—the more I’d thought of it, the more I suspected that was exactly what I’d been doing unconsciously on the vampires.If he looked at me, I could do it…A bone-deep certainty slammed into me.
I could do this.
I shook myself. Doing that would be wrong. Taking away his free will—wasn’t that what I feared the vampires did? And to do so especially on someone who had been almost a friend, a mentor.
I hated that I was contemplating it. I hated that if I continued to explore my powers the way I needed to, I’d probably have to confront those questions over and over.
I’ll only do it for the bad vampires. Surely I can draw a line.
“You can sit,” I said awkwardly when I realized I’d been staring too long. Surely he didn’t expect to stand around until Raphaelcame back. Or, well, actually, that very well might have been his plan.
“I’m aware.” He avoided eye contact with me. Too angry to even meet my gaze? It stung. I’d hoped there had been some ease given the fact that I’d apologized and we’d spent weeks on the road together, but it seemed it was to be a frosty few hours, or however long Raphael would be gone.
He was protective of Raphael. It was more than base loyalty, and as much as I admired it, it stung.
