“It’s not my home anymore.”
“At least tell me where you are so I can see you.”
He paused.“Come to the bleachers at Christie Pits, tomorrow at two.”He hung up before I could say anything.
––––––––
The next day, I showedup early.An hour early.I had no pride left.I was shivering in my coat.I always felt the cold when I was tired, and I hadn’t slept.
He showed up exactly on time.I knew because I checked my phone, and when I looked up, he was walking through the snow toward me.He wasn’t looking at me, and his shoulders were up around his ears.He wasn’t wearing a hat or gloves.He walked up without saying a word, swept the snow off the bench and sat far enough away I couldn’t touch him.
“I can’t believe you moved out.”
“Why?”he said.“Did you think I’d be waiting for you when you got back?You thought I’d be mad at you for a few days, and then we’d go back to how we were?”
“I know my parents were shitty to you, but—”
“You stood there and let them treat me like that.”
“I didn’t!I didn’t let them make you eat in the kitchen.”
“She made me eat at a fucking card table!”
“There was no room at the dining table.”
“She introduced me to her friends as your “friend.”And you didn’t correct her.And what happened on Christmas Day, huh?When you saw there were no presents for me under the tree and stockings for everybody but me?”
“Mom said she put them away.”
“Bullshit.There were never any presents for me.When you were out on your fucking sleighride, I looked.On Christmas Eve, the stockings were up, and there wasn’t one for me.Your sister’s boyfriend got one.They’ve been dating, what, three months?I left because of how they were treating me, and you stayed with them.”
“They just need time.”
He looked outraged.“Craig, I was willing to listen to what you had to say, but now I’m done.I don’t want to hear any more of your bullshit excuses for your parents.They stabbed me in the back.They stabbedyouin the back, and you’re still defending them.”
“Okay, I won’t talk about my parents.”
“You don’t understand,” he said.“I am done.With you.We’re done.”
Even though I knew it was coming, it hit me like a freight train.“You’re breaking up with me?”
“What the fuck do you think?”
“You can’t throw away everything we have.”
“You’re the one who threw it away.Because your parents’ approval means more to you than I do.”
“They don’t approve of me!”I said.
“The fact you give a shit what those homophobes think is the problem.Go find yourself a nice girl to marry.Someone you can hold hands with in front of your mom, ’cause you wouldn’t do it with me.And when you do, give her this.”
He wrenched off his engagement ring and held it out to me, but I put my hands in my pockets.He set the ring on the little pile of snow between us.
“But I love you,” I said.
His eyes were hard.“I believe you.But it doesn’t matter, because I don’t trust you anymore.I can never trust you to have my back.”
“Don’t do this.I need you.I can’t sleep at night.”
