I was the one who felt sorry.For dumping my issues on him.For letting him think I could be a real boyfriend he could fuck properly.
I didn’t know where we went from here, but I wouldn’t blame him for leaving and never coming back.
I opened the paper bag from the pharmacy and stared at the pill bottle.“I’m supposed to take this with food.”
“I’ll get you something.”He went to the kitchen.I didn’t move.He came out a few minutes later with a ham and cheese sandwich and a glass of milk and set them on the coffee table in front of me.
I took a bite, popped one of the pills and had to drink the whole glass of milk to get it down because it stuck in my throat.I sat there with him beside me.Suddenly, I felt a hundred pounds heavier.
“Fuck these pills.He said they’d knock me out.”Sitting up was too much, so I lay on the couch.
“You want to go to bed?”he said.
“I’m not gonna make it to bed.I can’t get up.”
“I can help you, if you want.”
“Okay.”
He was smaller than I was, and he struggled to hold me up.I tried to help, but I was falling asleep on my feet, and it was mostly him and the wall keeping me upright.When we got to the bedroom, I fell face-first onto the bed.He rolled me onto my side.My coat and boots were still on, and I didn’t even try to get them off becausebang, lights out.
I woke up feeling weird and groggy.Then I remembered.Little pieces and then chunks.The light was on, and he was lying beside me reading his script.He’d gotten my boots and coat off while I was asleep.
I got up to use the bathroom.The floor felt like it was tilting.When I came back, he’d brought me a bowl of something hot with noodles.
“Figured you’d be hungry,” he said, “so I made something.”
It didn’t look like it came out of a can.Like I said, it was bad news when he cooked.
“How is it?”he said.
I didn’t want to hurt his feelings, but...“This pasta sauce is kinda thin.”
“It’s soup.”
“Oh.Thanks.”I made myself eat it.“What day is it?”
“Thursday.”
“Still?”
“You’ve been asleep for eight hours.”
I finished the soup and got out of bed to take the bowl to the kitchen.He came with me.
“I can order a pizza,” he said.“If you’re still hungry.”
“Are you hungry?”
“A little.”He picked up the phone.
I sat on the couch, feeling wiped out.I was in no shape to practice tap.Or do anything.
He finished ordering the pizza and put the phone down.That was something.We both liked the same toppings.He sat beside me.
“Thanks for not leaving,” I said.
“They didn’t need me on set today.”
