Eating a meal helped.I felt better.Not on top form, but I could do this, and as I practiced, I went inside my head, like the best times when I tapped, and I started to relax.
That was when he came back to the trailer.Even though I was in my head, and my eyes were closed, I felt him there, calm and wonderful.
I opened my eyes, and he was standing by the door, giving me space.He seemed subdued.
“You look better,” he said.
I was so glad to see him, I hugged him tight.He gasped and pulled away.
“What’s wrong?”I said.
“Shooting got a little rough.”
“Are you okay?”
He shrugged, but he seemed closed off, like he’d rather I not know.
“This happened under Jack’s watch?”I said.
“It was his idea.But Edgar made it worse.”
“Edgar—the guy you had the sex scene with inWanton Town?”
“Yeah,” he said.“Don’t say anything to him.He’d just get off on it.”
“This is fucked up, Eddie.Jack’s paying you to be some kind of S&M fucktoy for him.”
“Craig, let it go.The scene’s done.No one has to punch me anymore.”
I held him by the shoulders, carefully this time, and I kissed him.“Okay, honey kid, but if he pulls that shit on you in front of me, I’m going to say something.”
“You have to warm up, right?”he said.
“I already have.”
A sharp rap sounded on the door of the trailer, and I felt him jump.
“Craig,” said Jack.“Out.”
Eddie left the trailer first, and I went out after him.Jack was already halfway to the boardwalk.The cold air outside woke me up.I gave my jacket to Eddie because it would be too hot to wear once I started dancing, but I kept my hoodie on.It hadn’t rained, so the boards were dry.Jack was busy setting up, so while he did that, I warmed up again, getting a feel for the boardwalk’s surface.
Then Jack said, “Craig, can I get you to start at the head of the boardwalk and then work your way down?Don’t look at the camera.Don’t look at me—look straight ahead.Pretend we’re not here.The camera will pull back ahead of you.Don’t overtake it.Understand?”
“Yeah,” I said.
I’d been filmed dancing on a boardwalk before, but the energy had been different.It had been three of us from the same company in the summer.We’d had a blast riffing off each other.This time, the director was pissed off, it was cold, and I was dancing alone.
Eddie stood off to the side, watching me, and that made me feel better.Then Edgar sidled up to him with a nasty smile, and said something.Eddie said something back, and Edgar laughed.Not like it was funny.More like he’d scored a point.I hated that Edgar knew what Eddie’s kink was, and I didn’t.
“Craig,” said Jack.“Look at me.”
Then he called action.I’d never been sharp coming out of the gate.Jack had me do my routine right down the boardwalk before he stopped me.
“You’re squinting, Craig,” said Jack, “Have we got sunglasses?”
Someone from the crew came over and gave me a pair.They looked expensive.
“Take it from the top again, Craig,” said Jack.
