“I hate this.” Noc let his head fall into his hands.
My heart was heavy as I glanced at my love. I hated to make him worry. But at the same time, this wasn’t something I could walk away from. I had to get to my parents, one way or another.
“So come with me, then,” I urged. I knew he had responsibilities here. He needed to be a more prominent leader with his men, to show Isla that Rhyne’s alliance wasn’t misplaced. Yet, in my very core I knew he wouldn’t be himself if he thought I were in danger. He’d be distracted. Possibly reckless. And that wasn’t the image we wanted to portray, either.
Gaige scraped his fingers along his trimmed beard as he tipped his chin upward. “It could work. Accessing their bestiaries and opening the door can only be done by you, but I don’t recall any restrictions about who can actually pass through said door. Of course, no one has been daft enough to try.”
“Why would that make me daft?” My brows knit together. “Noc has gone to the beast realm with me before.”
“And exited with you the same way you entered.” He leaned forward, bracing his forearms along his knees. “That’s not unheard of. The problem is, this whole theory is simply that—a theory. We don’t know what we’re dealing with. What if you’re able to slip through the door because you’re their daughter, and Noc is left in the realm? No one has ever been trapped there before. We have no idea what could happen to him.”
At that, Kost stilled. “You can’t afford that risk.”
The muscles racing along Noc’s neck tensed. Slowly, he lifted his head. “But I should let her go alone?”
“You are the guild master of Cruor. The rightful king of Lendria. The person waging this gods-forsaken war. If you die or get stuck, what do you think would be the result?” Something sharp and fierce flashed through his eyes. “Forget about Rhyne’s allegiance. Forget about Cruor. Forget about everything all together, because Varek will have gotten what he wanted, and Yazmin, too. She’ll rain fire down on a land that has no means to protect itself. That’s what will happen.”
“But sacrificing the queen of Lendria is more justifiable?” Ice dripped from his words, and he clasped his hands together.
Kost didn’t flinch. “No. I don’t want Leena doing this either, but as she’s the only one who can, I don’t have a choice.”
Tension snapped tight between them, and I slid closer to Noc on the couch we shared. Placing my hands over his, I rubbed a thumb along his bone-white knuckles. “Noc, he’s right.”
He didn’t respond. Only glowered.
Kost sighed and removed his spectacles, pinning them between his forefinger and thumb. “Leena must go. But if she finds her parents there, and they do happen to be imprisoned in Wilheim’s castle or nearby, she should leave them there for the time being.”
“What?” My voice rose an octave. Now it was my turn to share the anger Noc felt. Kost had been right about him staying behind, but this was a step too far. “I’m not leaving them in some cell.”
Kost replaced his lenses. “Only for a short while. I’ve been thinking on what…Gaige said last night.” He didn’t look at the Charmer seated across from him, but tripped over his name just the same. “If this theory proves true and they are being held in the capital, Yazmin has handed us an incredible advantage. A back door into enemy territory.
“And you should take someone with you now, so we can find out if it’s possible for more to accompany you in the future.” His green eyes hammered deep into my skull, and a tingling sensation rushed over my limbs. He was asking me to leave my parents in Wilheim’s clutches because it would be advantageous for us in the coming war. We’d theoretically have a way to funnel at least a small, elite troop of fighters right into the castle. There was merit in his approach, and judging by the way he implored me to consider the idea with his weighted gaze, he knew it. He always knew it. But to leave my parents behind when they’d be within my reach? Could I even do that?
I glanced at Noc, but his anger had softened into something much worse—remorse. Agony. Distress. All of it plain as day on his face. He couldn’t come with me. And he couldn’t deny Kost’s logic.
The world swam out of focus as my chest tightened. “And if Yazmin kills them before we can attack?”
At that, Kost averted his eyes. “It’s a risk. War is full of them.”
“Leena.” Gaige’s tone was soft. “We’re running out of time.” It was all he could muster, but it was enough to prove that he agreed with Kost. Toying with Okean’s key around his neck, he looked away.
“This is a sacrifice I’m afraid you’ll have to make. I don’t envy you.” Kost kept his voice low. Apologetic. I hated it. “Your parents, or the possibility to turn the tide of war? To save everyone else?”
“But saving them would add numbers to our forces. Yazmin wouldn’t be able convince them to join her side,” I tried, gaze frantically bouncing between Gaige, Kost, and Noc. None of them met my stare.
“We don’t know how many there are,” Kost finally said, “let alone what kind of state they’re in.”
“But what about Yazmin?” I grasped at any argument I could, hoping one would be sound enough for us to rescue my parents instead of leaving them behind. “If we rescue the Charmers, then she’ll have no reason to raise Ocnolog. That’s why she’s doing this, right? We can show her that everyone is safe. We can avoid war altogether.”
Gaige let out a shaky breath before raising his chin to look at me. “Leena. You don’t believe that. Youcan’t. Do you really think she’d stop now? After everything she’s done?”
No. But I didn’t want to say it out loud and give merit to his reasoning. Apparently, my silence was enough, though, and he shook his head.
“Yazmin has everything she needs to raise Ocnolog. The captive Charmers might be the reason she went down this path in the beginning, but they’re not why she’s still on it. Otherwise, she would’ve returned with them already.”
“She wants to see the kingdom burn, Leena.” Noc threaded his fingers with mine. “We need a way to stop her before that happens. If we can sneak into the castle without her or Varek knowing, then we have a chance to end this.”
I wanted to take his logic and toss it out the window. Let it crash with the falls and be buried under the weight of the water. Wrapping my arms around my stomach, I stared at the floor and fought back tears. Why? Why did it have to come to this? One life shouldn’t be more important than another. But if I picked saving my parents and the captive Charmers over my people—everyone who inhabited Lendria—that’s exactly what I’d be doing. Placing value on their existence over an entire country full of innocent people. Only a ruler would ever face such a predicament.
