She tilts her head to look at me. “More?”
“Absolutely.”
She gives me a grateful smile and then continues. “I shouldn’t have turned a blind eye to things with Rocky. I’d heard whispers that he could be overly familiar on film sets. I guess I didn’t want to believe it was more than that. Just harmless flirting, you know? Besides, we were married. I trusted him. So, I looked the other way and told myself it was nothing. Just petty gossip. Until one night, someone took a video of him making out with the star of one of his movies and TMZ posted it online.”
I wince. “Oof.”
“Right?” She takes a deep breath, steadying herself. “The worst part was that when the video was posted, people started coming out of the woodwork with stories. Some women claimed to have slept with him. Others had screenshots of their DM convos. Worst of all, everyone on set seemed to have known about the affair for months, and not one person thought to tell me. Do you know how humiliating it is, to realize you are the last to know your husband is cheating on you?”
A single tear escapes her eye, and I reach out to brush it away with my thumb.
“I’m so sorry,” I tell her. “You didn’t deserve any of that. Neither did your kids.”
“Thank you. I mean, I don’t regret my relationship with Rocky. If I hadn’t met him, I wouldn’t have Isla and Levi, the two most important people in my life.” Her mind seems to reel, and then she goes on. “And after this trip, I’m sure they’re going to want to spend more time with him.”
She gives me a weak smile. “I just wish things hadn’t ended likethey did. After what went down with my parents, I never wanted my own kids to have a broken home.”
I have a brief flashback to the last time I saw her before she left to filmLittle LLC, tear-streaked and hiding behind the bushes. I know how hard Marissa took her parents’ divorce, but I never considered how it would impact her as a mom. Does she wish she hadn’t divorced Rocky? If she got her wish for a do-over, would she have stayed married to him?
If there’s one thing I’ve learned about Marissa, it’s that her family is her biggest priority.
And if there was ever a chance for her to make it whole again, how could I stand in her way?
29JESSE
A week passes by in a leisurely mixture of sun and sex. And every night, we sit outside and watch the sunset from my front porch.
“I think I’ve lost all track of time,” Marissa tells me now. “I don’t even remember the last time I’ve felt this relaxed.” She rolls her head to the side and gives me a lazy smile. “It’s such an odd feeling, since time is something I’m usually constantly aware of. I am the master of the calendar, the keeper of everyone’s schedules. When does Isla have dance? What time is Levi’s dentist appointment? Is school closed again today? I can’t remember the last time I’ve felt this untethered to a schedule, and it feels like jumping from a plane in the moments before the parachute opens: equal parts terrifying and exhilarating.”
I am in awe of this woman. It’s hard enough to keep myself and my dog alive. She’s juggling so much and she’s doing it alone. It’s not that she isn’t capable. It’s just that she deserves a partner. Someone to help carry the weight on her shoulders so she doesn’t have to do it all on her own.
“It’s summer,” I tell her. “There’s no such thing as time.” Diesel is sitting between her legs, and I watch as Marissa scratches absentmindedly between the dog’s ears. His tail is thumping happily and it’s clear that he adores her. Something my dog and I have in common. It feels so natural to be sitting here together, a portrait ofdomesticity. Man, woman, and dog, enjoying a lazy sunset evening together.
Diesel hops off the edge of the porch, presumably to go to the bathroom. I barely notice, since I’m far too distracted by Marissa and the way the setting sun illuminates her profile, highlighting every one of her features. She’s so painfully, unimaginably beautiful, and I can’t believe that I get to call her mine. Even if it’s only for a little while, I want to savor every second of it. But the spell is broken when I hear frantic digging beneath the deck, followed by a low growl. I jerk upright in my chair. Goddamn it. Not again.
“Hey, buddy?” I call, rising to stand. “What are you up to?” As if this mutt is going to answer me.
Marissa throws me a questioning look. “What is it?”
“He found a skunk burrow a few days ago and he won’t leave it alone. It’s only a matter of time before—”
My words are interrupted by a yelp, and a moment later, Diesel is bounding up the porch steps. The immediate, overwhelming stench is self-explanatory.Shit.
“Oh! Oh my god!” Marissa pulls her shirt over her nose. “Is he okay? He smells like green eggs and ham.”
“That’s generous,” I mutter.
Diesel howls as he rolls on the grass, frantically trying to get the smell off his fur. I know how this goes, because it’s not his first time getting skunked. I’ve already got all the de-skunk supplies in my laundry room. The worst part is getting him into the bath. He’s going to need more than one rinse, and he already hates water more than most dogs. There’s no way I’ll be able to keep him in the tub and wash him. Backup will be required.
“I’m going to call my brother,” I tell Marissa. I throw her an apologetic look. “Sorry to cut the night short. But I’ll see you tomorrow?”
She lifts one eyebrow. “Call your brother? For what?”
Diesel pauses his rolling to puke in the grass. Then he walks slowly up the porch and collapses pitifully at my feet. The smell is so much worse now and I fight back the urge to gag as I tuck my own nose into my shirt.
“I need a second set of hands,” I explain through the fabric. “Diesel… doesn’t exactly do well in the bath.”
She holds her hands up. “You have a second set right here.”
