“You don’t get to have a say about my life.” Arabella paused. “I’m sorry, that was terribly unfair of me to say.”
Her grandmother’s face softened. “You are hurting.”
“Quite possibly, but no good will come from dwelling on this,” Arabella said, walking over to the door. “If you will excuse me, I need to go change out of my riding habit.”
“You can’t keep avoiding talking about this.”
“I can try.”
Her grandmother gave her a disapproving look, but fortunately didn’t press her. “I shall be in the breakfast parlor.”
“I’ll join you soon,” Arabella said as she departed from the room.
Chapter Four
Colin rubbed the scar on his left leg as he sat at his desk in the study. He had been reviewing ledgers for hours and found himself growing increasingly disinterested with each turn of the page.
He had never wanted this life. He had been content serving in the army, fighting alongside his comrades. Now, he spent his days sitting in meetings and discussing farming techniques. There was no adventure, no danger. It was far too predictable for his tastes.
A long clock chimed in the corner, alerting him that it was almost time to call on Arabella. She was a welcome distraction to his boring routine. He could scarcely believe that he saw her this morning. He had dreamed of little else since he had broken their engagement, especially since he had never stopped loving her. How could he? She meant just as much to him now as she did back then. That is why he’d had no choice but to end their engagement, since his paltry income could not provide for her as she deserved.
But his circumstances had changed. He was an earl now, and he had every intention of trying to earn Arabella’s affection. He knew that he had hurt her deeply, but would she ever find it in her heart to forgive him?
His brother’s voice came from the doorway. “Why do you look so sullen?”
“I’m thinking.”
“Does thinking not come naturally to you?”
Colin closed the ledger in front of him and gave his brother an expectant look. “What is it you want, John?” he asked.
John stepped further into the room. “I have come to spend Christmas with you.”
“Delightful,” Colin muttered.
“According to Mother, you are being insufferable right now,” John revealed.
“I daresay she is prone to exaggeration.”
“Perhaps, but I found the countryside to be more appealing than staying in Town.” John walked over to the drink cart, picked up the decanter, and poured himself a drink. “Luckily for you, the courts are closed until after the holiday.”
“Lucky me.”
John picked up his glass and walked over to the settee. “Mother was right. You are being rather cranky.”
Colin leaned back. “I do apologize. I find reviewing the ledgers puts me in a deplorable mood.”
“I am not surprised.”
“This,” Colin said, waving his hand over his desk, “is not something that I enjoy doing. I gave up a military career to sit behind a desk and attend meetings.”
“Most would be envious of your position,” John remarked. “You are an earl, and a wealthy one at that.”
“Would you be willing to give up being a barrister to help manage the estate?” Colin asked. “I could pay you double what you are earning now.”
John took a sip of his drink. “I’m happy where I am.”
“That is what I assumed, but I had to at least try.”
