It’s all gone.Everything. Just as I knew it would happen. Nothing is safe or secure. My career is over. Maggie’s face is drained of color except for a red welt on her cheek.
Maggie.
I lunge for her right as her knees give out. Her whole body shakes in my arms.
“Roe.” She grips my shoulders for her dear life. “I didn’t write that. You have to know that I would never write that.”
It hurts too much to look at her. This morning feels like a lifetime ago. Itwasa lifetime ago. I was a different person then. It will forever be known as the Before. Before my career ended. Before my town was destroyed. Before my family disowned me.
“He lied. He promised me he wouldn’t publish it.”
My chest cracks in half. I don’t want to believe. All this time she was collecting facts to use against me? This couldn’t be true. Not after what we shared. Not after last night. It doesn’t add up.
“You wrote it?” My voice is surprisingly cold and even-tempered. The opposite of hers. She’s frazzled as a live wire. She’s pleading with those large eyes.
I deposit her on a stool and step back. She falls to her knees in front of me anyway. Her arms are wrapped tight around her middle.
“No. Please, no, I didn’t write it, Roe. I came here to tell you everything.”
Seeing her like this—shaking and groveling, it turns my stomach. Gently, I wrap her in my arms and pick her up. She seems to come apart with relief.
“What’s happening?” I ask.
She starts to spill out an explanation. It’s hard to follow and she’s stuttering. Something about Viktor and Zebulund and planted stories.
“Stop. Take a breath. And slow down.” I’ve never seen her like this. She’s a mess. I stop her again when she says she was driving up the mountain.
“You went to his cabin alone?” My rage isn’t well hidden.
“I know it was stupid. But I was driving and my source called and told me all this stuff about you. About money being stolen. But I knew it wasn’t true. I knew it was blackmail.” She takes a deep breath and stares desperately at me. “I knew you would never do that. I trusted that it wasn’t true. I was furious that someone would set you up like that. I wasn’t thinking clearly. I didn’t want you to be any more involved in all this than I already got you. I wanted to go get that computer and stop them before they could hurt you. I realized it was a stupid plan when I got there so I turned around to leave… but it was too late. I was set up.”
Despite my fury I hug her close to me. Somehow I can’t let her go, even though I’m angry and scared and don’t know what’s up or down.
“I promised to work with him. And he said he’d leave you alone.”
The numbness closes back in. The world is pressing down. I haven’t eaten since breakfast. My stomach rumbles. We both hear it but she doesn’t say a word. Maybe Maggie is right about my relationship with food, because this went down after I ate those fucking pancakes. It’s not real but the thought keeps coming back.
“That article posted hours ago. Before you even left Zebulund’s cabin,” I manage to say through a closed throat.
“But he didn’t know. He asked if you knew who I was. I told him no.”
“It was a test,” I say. “He must’ve known you’d come straight to me.” I’m numb. Rationally I know it’s not Maggie’s fault. And yet…
“I would never do that to you, Roe.” She reads my mind.
“I know.”
“I’ll print a retraction.”
“It doesn’t matter. The information is out there.” How long until the police come for me? How long until everything else falls down?
Her face is raw with pain. If I wasn’t lost in my own rage, I’d comfort her.
“It’s already out there, Maggie. Even if your name is taken off, it’s still fact to anybody who looks into it. I was an example. Like Viktor.”
“I’ll make it right. I’ll do whatever I need to do.”
She really believes it too. After all this. That familiar conviction is clear under the green pallor and quivering chin. I know the truth, though. It all had to come crashing down someday. Nothing good last forever.
