She all but fell out of the office, and I chased after her.
“Charles, wait,” Sally said.
I glanced at Kate’s retreating form.
“This could be what saves your reputation,” Sally said. “What’s your plan? To hide out in the middle of nowhere forever? This could be good for you. Don’t you want that?”
I shook my head. “I just want Kate,” I said and turned to follow Kate.
This. This was exactly why I never left home. Never trusted anybody.
“I’ll send you some paperwork,” Sally called after me.
39
Kate
There was no literary agent.
It was a lie.
Was there anybody in the show who cared about my novel?
I stumbled outside, the bright California sun temporarily blinding me. I put a hand to my chest and tried to calm myself.
Charlie followed me out a moment later. That look she’d given him.Things we do … it’s just business. A terrifying understanding dawned on me. Something I hadn’t even considered. I bit back a sob.
“Was any of this real?” I asked him when he stepped in front of me, blocking the sun.
“Yes, of course. Kate. Look at me.” He grabbed my hands. “You and I are real.”
“I’m not talking about you and me,” I snapped and regretted the hurt that flashed on his face. “My writing. I thought they brought me here because of my writing. Because of all the followers. Because it meant something.” I gasped and bent over, and my hands went to my knees. “Oh my god. It was you. You told them to bring me here so you—you could meet me? See me?”
I felt sick and icy with dread. This couldn’t be happening. My whole life upended in just a few short days. It was a dream. I had been so silly.
Charlie dropped to his knees in front of me. “Kate. No. Christ, no. I swear to god. I found out you were invited when you told me.” He gripped my hands, shaking them until I looked at him. His eyes were wide and wild. “Your writing got you here,” he said.
“Did it?” How could my voice sound so calm when my insides were rioting?
“Of course.”
“I want to believe you,” I said.
He rubbed his forehead across my knuckles. “Please believe me.”
Our connection had been so deep and raw from the very first message. I wanted us to be real more than anything.
“I don’t know this world. I feel so stupid. I’ve been lied to over and over.” I coughed out a sob and pulled my hands away to wrap them around myself.
He stood up and pulled me into a hug, squeezing so tight. “You aren’t stupid. And you should believe me. I would never—”
He cut himself off, and then I really felt the earth shift. I stepped out of his arms. “Don’t finish that sentence with something we both know isn’t true,” I said.
His Adam’s apple bobbed. “Kate. I would never do anything to hurt you. I was trying to protect you from all this. Why do you think I never told you who I was?” He turned away and kicked the stucco wall of the building. “Fuck. This was exactly what I didn’t want you to experience. This seedy underbelly. You’re so pure and good and look at what they’re doing to us.”
I pulled back, a tear overflowing from my eye. “I didn’t care about the rumors, Charlie. I don’t know how many times I have to say that. I didn’t care because I knew you believed in me. I knew I was brought here for my writing.” Another tear leaked out and I quickly wiped it away. “I don’t know that anymore. I want to believe that but part of me from the very beginning felt this was all too good to be true.” I was having a hard time breathing. “And … I just wanted to be taken seriously as a writer. That was all I ever wanted. Now everything the internet is saying is true. I didn’t get here because of my talent. I got here because of you. Your machinations.” I glanced around and scoffed. “What am I even doing here?”
“You are a serious writer.” His nostrils flared. “I don’t know how many times I have to tellyouthat. You are here because of your work. I didn’t do anything to get you … here.” That second of hesitation wasn’t missed. The darkness that passed over his face.
