I wanted to ask how he would fare if the situation were reversed and he had an attractive woman running their hands all over him, playing doctor, but I thought it best not to point out the obvious. I just shrugged a shoulder.
“You’ll feel better once you eat.” As if on cue, there was a brisk knock on the door.
Pace returned a moment later, and the grumbling of my stomach went full beast mode.
“Sorry,” I said this time. “You’d think I’d never seen food before,” I teased back.
He chuckled, and he pushed the tray of delicious meats, cheeses, crackers, and jam toward me.
“Please, you’re free to go wild on this,” he said.
Our eyes met for another brief moment, and I looked away before I could blush.
Sure enough, after I carefully ate around my now partially swollen lip, I felt like a whole new person.
“I think I’m ready to tell you what happened,” I said.
He had been watching me in silence, his features neutral, and I had no idea what he was thinking.
When I spoke, some of that easy charm returned, eyebrows flicking.
“Only if you want.” I could tell he was twisted up with guilt, like it was somehow his fault, and I realized that he had taken my utter failure on as his own.
“It’s okay. Like a Band-Aid.”
20
Pace
Only after ensuringSophie nibbled her way through half the board, the kid made did I start to relax.
It didn’t matter what she told me, today had been my fault.
This wasn’t what I’d intended, not by a long shot. When I’d thought about how this day would go, I imagined her getting cash and then spending time in the town square, looking at pumpkins and buying treats. I didn’t expect to end up at the firehouse with those soon-to-be ex-firefighter cracking jokes and drooling over her.
Since when did they start acting like such idiots?
It didn’t help that I could hardly keep my shit together as she spoke. Her body was something drafted from my deepest fantasies. Thighs and hips for sturdy gripping, big sensitive breasts to gently toy with for hours, bringing her to the brink of pleasure just by teasing her ...
“It’s like I can feel you blaming yourself for this,” she said.
And I instantly felt shame. That’s what I should have been feeling. It was all that repeated through my brain before she tookthat sweater off. But then the sudden desire that pulsed through me took me by surprise. I’d been trying to deny my growing attraction to her, telling myself she was beautiful but not for me, but the second that sweater came off, it was like I was a teenage boy. All I thought of was boobs.
Look at her boobs. Do you think she would let me touch those boobs?And so on ...
I punched my teenage self in the proverbial gut and got back to Sophie.
“A little,” I confessed. “Certainly not what I planned.”
She leaned forward and grabbed my hand from where I had my fist pressed against my lips, ready to hear it all.
I grunted, and it was like I had embodied Levi’s grumpy responses.
“I promise it wasn’t your fault. I only have myself to blame.” She squeezed me and went to release my hand, but I didn’t let her.
I sat next to her on the bench but kept our fingers interlocked.
“It’s really not that serious,” she said, and I winced because I had said that at some point, and I knew she was trying to convince herself as much as me.
