“Nothing that passes between us goes any further than you and I,” Ranger vowed. Taking his free hand, he brought it up to her chin, forcing her to tip her face down towards him. “I don’t share, Antonia.”
She visibly shuddered over him. “Why is it so hot when you use my full name? I hate my full name.”
“It’s beautiful,” he declared honestly. “Your eyes flare every time I say it, like someone’s lighting a fire behind your irises. I love how expressive your eyes are.”
“I don’t…” Even in the dark car, Ranger could see her cheeks darken. “I don’t normally look. I don’t know what it is about you. I can’t seem to look away. You’re different, Ranger. I don’t know how and I don’t know why.” Her breath caught as he increased the pressure on her clit. “Oh, God.Ranger…”
“Liam.”
Unlike others—like Bulldog, Lucky, Bear, Steel, and Ghost—Ranger had changed his road name from his military moniker of Snow White. It had been his teammates’ unoriginal reference to his white-blonde hair. No way in hell was he bringing that name into the club. He was proud of his time as a Ranger. He’d earned that scroll, and wanted to carry it with him. Other than his mother and sister, he hadn’t been ‘Liam’ to anyone who mattered in a long, long time.
He didn’t know how, but after a day, he knew with certainty that Toni mattered.
“Liam,” she whispered passionately.
Ranger had to breathe through his nose as his chest shook. “Always Liam to you.”
Her eyes flared, and he wished the cage wasn’t as dark as it was so he could see her more clearly. “Are you sure? That seems so…intimate.”
Taking his hand from her chin to grip the back of her neck, Ranger brought her face down to him, taking her lips in a dominating kiss. “You’re damn right, it is, Antonia.”
Toni stared down at him, but even as she shook her head, her hips never stopped rocking against him. “I can’t… It’s too soon. There are things we don’t know…”
Ranger’s hand tightened on the back of her neck as his other hand increased the stimulation on her sensitive clit. “I don’t give a fuck. I have been falling, sinking in quicksand, for so long, and with you is the only time I have felt truly like myself in months. So I don’t give a damn if it’s fast, I don’t give a damn what societysays is proper. I wantyou, Antonia, and fuck what anyone else thinks.”
Her breaths started coming out in short, uneven spurts. “I can’t… I don’t know… I can’t think with you touching me like this!” she cried out loudly.
“Then don’t think,” he pressed. “Just feel. Look at me, andfeel…”
Toni’s back bowed as her orgasm swept her away, and Ranger could not recall a more beautiful sight in all the world. He didn’t wait for her to come down. He grabbed a condom from his wallet and released himself from his jeans. Shifting her panties aside, Ranger got her into position over his hard cock as she still fought for breath.
“Ready?” he questioned the second her eyes met his again.
She nodded quickly, looking very much like a bobblehead.
Ranger pressed himself inside, groaning at the tight feel of her. He didn’t know what it was about Toni, but she felt incredible. So different than any other woman he’d been with. Or maybe it was no mystery at all, and it was simplyher. Maybe he couldn’t love her as she deserved, maybe he wasn’t capable of those feelings anymore. Honestly, he didn’t give a damn. All he knew, with an immeasurable amount of certainty, was that he’d found the woman he was going to spend the rest of his life with.
He just had to convince her of that.
* * *
Toni felt drainedand reenergized at the same time. Like she could run a marathon if she could just find it in her to get up. And yet, there was absolutely no part of her that wanted to move ever again. The inside of the car was hot, their combined body heat a furnace in the already warm night.
Ranger’s fingers traced up and down her spine, so lightly that if it wasn’t for the sparks of his touch she likely wouldn’t have felt it. Still on top of him, Toni was slumped against his chest, her head tucked under his chin. They were a mess. Carefully, Toni had brought her hands down from where he’d placed them, and to her surprise, he had not stopped her. Why was it that sometimes she was able to touch him, and other times, it appeared as if she could not? He never said ‘no’, never told her he did not consent to or did not want her touching him.
So why was it that he now allowed her to wrap her arms around his neck and play with the hair at the base of his skull when, during sex, he did not want her touch? Was she reading too much into it?
The smart play would be to ask. She was an attorney, and used to asking the hard questions. She could argue that she was too comfortable, and did not want to disturb the post-orgasm peace they had found. But she knew the real reason.
Asking would lead to talking, and talking would lead to why both of them were at an NA meeting tonight. Turned out, Toni was a chicken. A big, fat, clucking chicken who wanted more than anything the ability to freeze time. They would have to talk. She knew it, and so did he. The alternative was that they went their separate ways and never spoke again.
Did she want that? Could she walk away from this man she barely knew and yet felt such a connection to? Toni had spent her entire adult life devoted to her work. Relationships were secondary, but that was also an excuse. It was less harsh on the ego than to admit shesuckedat relationships. She’d never had a long-term one, and the ones that she thought might actually become something abruptly ended right after sex. So maybe she’d stopped trying, stopped looking. Claimed she was concentrating on work rather than admit the truth that no one wanted her, just wanted what she could do for them.
Yet, Ranger had never asked her for anything. Hell,shewas the one who’d asked him—or his club—to cover up her father’s murder. When Ranger touched her, Toni felt cherished, and while her brain was busy trying to convince herself it was too good to be true, her heart was already completely wrapped up in Ranger.
In Liam.
Toni didn’t want to be a chicken. Realistically and logically, she knew they couldn’t stay here forever. One of them would have to start talking, and as much as she absolutely hated it, she knew it had to be her. Not to prove him the coward, but to prove to herself that she wasn’t.
