I turned to the side, pouring him a cup and handing it to him.
He gulped it down quickly, giving it back to me for a refill, which he also knocked back. “What are you doing here?”
“I was checking on you. I didn’t want you to wake up alone.”
The corner of his lip curled in a soft smile, his eyelids closing as they did. “Thank you.”
“You’re welcome. How are you feeling?”
“Like I’ve been hit by a fucking bus.”
I took the morphine drip and put it in his hand. “Here. When you need more pain meds, click on this button and it’ll administer them automatically.”
He clicked on it like it was his Xbox controller, making me laugh.
“You only need to do it once. It cuts off when you’ve reached your maximum dosage.”
His head fell back onto the pillow and I leaned over him, pulling out my little pocket flashlight, flicking the light across one of his eyes before moving onto the other, checking his pupils for reaction. His hand shot out, gripping my wrist, holding my palm in place against his cheek. He looked up at me, his gaze earnest and searching, and I could feel his breath like a warm summer breeze across my skin, pebbling goosebumps in its wake.
“You’re so beautiful, Mol.”
His cerulean eyes turned cobalt in the darkened room as they locked onto mine, and I stopped breathing as his other hand slid up my free arm and around the back of my neck, pushing up into my hair, twisting around it. His head lifted as he pulled mine down to meet him, stopping with a hair’s breadth between us.
“I’ve always wondered what your lips would feel like against mine.”
His words were a whisper against my mouth, soft and feather light before he pressed his onto mine, slowly deepening his touch and surrounding mine, his lips taking hold, alleviating me of my senses and any form of resistance.
His lips parted and his tongue licked along mine, silently asking for permission, and I opened up for him, allowing him access. He slipped inside so leisurely I wondered if I was imagining it, until his other hand let go of my wrist and cupped my face, holding me still, intensifying our connection, bringing me in as close as he could get me.
His tongue slid against mine, caressing gently, undulating around my mouth with a lazy sensuality which hit me deep in my belly, stoking the embers until flames curled up my spine. On and on he kissed me until I could no longer feel my fingers and toes, feel my reality, feel any element of being in my own body. Then his kiss slowed down, and with a soft hum his hand dropped away, his lips departing mine as his head moved back to the pillow.
“Fuck, you’re incredible.”
He slowly blinked up at me until his eyes stayed closed and, with a deep breath, he fell asleep.
I stood back, unsure of what had just happened in the last five minutes of my life. My fingers touched my lips, the imprint of where his had been seconds ago still burned into my skin. And I knew if I looked down, I’d be able to see my heart beating out of my chest.
I stood there, watching him sleep, just as I had when I’d first come into his room.
Because here’s a secret I’ve never told anyone. Not one living soul.
I used to be in love with Felix Cleverly.
And after tonight, after that kiss, I’m pretty sure I still am.
Chapter 25
Iwoke to a throbbing pain deep in my bones; deep down in the tissues, in the mitochondria, in the cells of my body.
Every single fucking cell throbbed.
I could almost hear it.
Instead, the silence was broken by a steady beeping, which was both making my ears bleed and soothing me all at the same time with its rhythmic beat. I tried opening my eyes, but my lids felt like they were glued together. A heavy tugging sensation ran through me as I lifted my arm to wipe them enough until I could peek through them.
Fuzzy. Everything was fuzzy.
Fuck. I was in hospital.
