I don’t think I’d ever loved her more. I don’t think I’d ever been angrier at her.
She was blowing her life up for me; the brilliant life she had planned, forme.
I didn’t know what she thought our future was going to look like, but I could tell her right now it didn’t involve giving up on her dreams for me.
Her drive to get to M.I.T. was one of the things I loved most about her.
I sat back, reaching for the baseball I’d left on her nightstand, and tossed it into the air.
The stitching flickered as it spun as quickly as my mind was spinning.
I wasn’t sure what was making me angrier – that she’d lied to me, that she’d done this behind my back, or that she thought I’d be okay with it when I found out.
Or, as my throat became scratchy with the threat of tears, that I wouldn’t do the same for her.
If it came down to it right this second, would I give up the chance to play for The Dodgers?
No.
But I’d never doubted we wouldn’t last long distance.
And that meant there was only one thing I could do.
I didn’t let her know my parents invited her for dinner. I didn’t want to see the lie in her eyes if the subject of graduation came up. I ignored Emerson when she told me she’d returned from the mall. I replied to Marnie’s text with a simple, “I’ll see you later”, because while I knew what I needed to do, that didn’t mean I wasn’t going to hold her in my arms one last time.
Kiss her one last time.
Sneak out of her window one last time.
The full moon lit my way to her place, and I crept under her comforter when she held it open for me.
“Hey,” she breathed sleepily, wrapping her arms around my neck.
I twisted her into the little spoon, and kissed along her shoulder. “Hey, sorry I took so long. Did you have a fun time with Emerson?”
“Mmmmhmm,” her head softened on the pillow. “I’ll show you everything tomorrow. How was your day?”
“Just getting a few things ready for next week, and trying to plan out my calendar for when you’re in Boston.” My arms wrapped tighter around her body and I placed my palm over her heart. “I was thinking we could take a trip there before spring training begins. We can go and see your dorm, what do you think?”
Her chest caught, and her pulse quickened. I knew she’d heard.
“Star?”
She spun around to face me. “Jupe, stop talking and kiss me.”
My heart cracked.
I didn’t say a word as I pulled her underneath me, crushing my lips to hers, surrounding her, bruising us.
One last time.
MARNIE
“I’m getting really worried about her. It’s been a week. I think she needs to go to the doctor.”
“I’m going to murder that kid.”
I raised my head just enough to hear the muffled voices outside my room. But it wasn’t Jupiter, so I laid it back on the pillow and pulled the comforter over my head to block out the light creeping through the blinds.
