My favorite coffee brand that I’d never actually voiced. I do remember teasing her about how this Columbia Cosmic Goose by Loki Roasters was a ten on the Cece-coffee-scale.
Looks like she had filed it in her memory.
Because why the fuck am I staring at my favoritedark roast with a vision that continues to blur every ten seconds?
Christ.
I messaged Taewon an hour ago that I’ll be taking the day off. But I have no clue what to do with this free time.
Other than—of course—reliving last night where Cece tactfully put a mirror to our relationship.
A relationship I’ve been undeniably failing to protect.
??????
“I don’t think you love me, Levi. I think you just want to be loved by me. You’re chasing steadiness, simplicity. Convenience. Not… me.”
My heart sinks to my damn toes.
She’s frozen on my lap. But then, in a blink, she removes herself from me. I watch as her eyes lose the brightness I love so much.
Come to think about it, she’s been gradually slipping into some place in her mind that seems to have locked me out. And I have no one to blame but myself.
I try to grab her limp hands. She lets me. Or maybe she’s too tired to protest.
“I know you think that,” I say, my voice cracking. “I know I’ve given you reasons. But it’s not true.”
Her gaze drops to our hands, entangled with her resilience and my raw pleas.
“Cece.” I urge her to look up at me. She doesn’t. “Baby, I’m not chasing steadiness. I’m chasing your calm. Being with you isn’t the matter of simplicity. It’s… being with you is my goal that’s far from simple. And convenience? Sweetheart, I’m chasing you with or without the clause. There’s no two ways about it.”
I hear her sniffles and they break my damn heart. If I’d been open to her from the start about everything, she wouldn’t feel this way. She’d be confident in her place in my life.
But I’ve been fucking up for weeks now.
She removes one of her hands from my loose grip and grabs her phone from her purse.
I wait patiently for whatever her next move is. But everything halts to a fractured pulse, the moment she shows me a text thread.
I feel bile rise up my throat when I read the text.
Unknown: Thought you should know who he is with when not with you.
The images attached make me want to throw the damn phone toward a wall. Someone sent this to her. And I have no doubt it was either my parents or Gareth.
“Explain the pictures,” she whispers so softly that I almost miss it against the roaring in my ears.
I let out a ragged breath, gathering my thoughts before I make another mistake of stupidly keeping things from her.
“The first,” I clear my throat. “The first picture is from your parents’ anniversary.”
“I gathered that,” she says, her voice thick with restrained tears.
I nod. “Taewon and I felt like she was avoiding my family even though she’s technically our consultant now. And I’d already been… suspicious about how she broke up with me back then. I just—sorry, baby, I just wanted to know whether my parents were involved or not.”
She frowns. “Did it change anything? After she t-told you?”
“Yes,” I answer quickly, too quickly, that I finally manage to summon her eyes to me. Eyes that are now welling up withsomething akin to defeat.
