I let out a long, slow breath as my heart hammered against my ribs. I hadn’t expected so much honesty from him, and it was strange in a way, to hear him spell out all of his mistakes.
But he wasn’t the only one who’d made them though. And if Owen was going to take accountability for his actions then I had to as well, because I had been far from perfect. Blaming him was the easy way out, but it would also destroy everything.
“I’m sorry too,” I said, carefully dropping to my knees in front of him. The doormat was prickly and uncomfortable, digging into my skin and making it feel like I was kneeling on gravel or sandpaper.
“I should have talked to you, asked about your plans, told you how I felt. I just… I was so sure you’d be leaving and I was soscared of hearing that because I knew it would hurt. And I don’t really like pain, so I kinda ignored the whole thing and hoped it would go away. Or that you’d turn around and magically fight for this without me telling you what I wanted, like you’re a fucking mind reader. I guess…” I let out a tiny huff of self-deprecating laughter. “I guess I wanted you to choose me without me telling you I was a choice.”
“Will you let me choose you now?” Owen reached his hand out and let it hover above mine.
“Would you want to?”
“Yes. If you’ll let me, angel, I will choose you. Not because I have to, but because I want to. You’re everything to me. And if you’ll have me, I’ll keep choosing you. Every single day.”
“Choose me,” I said quietly, lifting my hand to take his, squeezing it tightly. “Please. And I’ll do the same. We can figure out how to make it work, I know we can. But I need you, Owen.”
“I need you too.” He lifted his other hand and reached out to cup my jaw. I could smell the tang of salt on his skin and it made me long for a taste. “Can I kiss you?”
“Yes.” I was already leaning towards him, one hand resting on his thigh to stop me from falling into his lap.
His kiss felt like coming home. Like safety and sanctuary—the place I’d been dreaming about finding. It had been right here all along, but we’d refused to see it.
There was salt on his lips and it made me think of all those mornings I’d stood on the front to watch him swim. I’d never think of salt the same way.
“You should come inside,” I said as I slowly broke the kiss, letting my forehead rest against him. “You need to dry off.”
“Are you sure?”
“Yeah, I am. Plus I can’t kneel on this mat for much longer, my legs are going numb.”
Owen chuckled softly. “Do you need me to carry you back inside?”
“That is very tempting,” I said, stealing another soft kiss.
“Come on then.” He sat back and climbed to his feet, his hand still holding mine. He threw his bag over his shoulder and then gently pulled me onto my feet. I wobbled slightly but as I did, he bent forward and scooped me up into his arms, holding me against his damp chest. I let out a weird, giggled squawk because I hadn’t expected him to do that.
The door to my flat had shut behind me, but somehow Owen managed to get it open and carry me inside without me hitting anything. I’d thought he’d put me down as soon as we got inside, but instead he carried me through to my bedroom and dropped me gently onto the bed.
“Are you okay if I borrow your shower?” he asked as he stepped back.
“Sure. Knock yourself out,” I said, almost disappointed he hadn’t kept kissing me. But also, I didn’t really want sand in my bed either, because even if I changed the sheets that didn’t guarantee it would stay beach-free.
“When you’re done, will you come back here?” I asked as I crossed my legs and looked up at him.
“Of course.” He bent down and kissed me. “We can talk more.”
I grinned, my face heating slightly. “Yeah, we can talk. But, er, maybe we can also…” I trailed off, almost embarrassed to ask for what I wanted.
“Also what?”
“Well, we did have a fight. A big one,” I said. “We should make up. With sex.”
“We should.” He smirked, heat dancing across his face in a way that made my cock ache. “Give me ten minutes, angel. ThenI’ll spend as long making things up to you as you want. Do you have anywhere to be today?”
I shook my head. Milo and Alfie could deal with me not coming in. They’d understand. “Not anymore.”
“Perfect.”
He kissed me again and then pulled away to head towards the bathroom, taking his bag with him.
