“What?”
“You’re staring.”
“No,” I say.
He turns his head, catching me red-handed. “Yeah, you are.”
“You could use some conce—uh, make up. Cover that up,” I say, gesturing at my neck.
“It’s still there?”
“Yup,” I say, popping the p.
He gets up, walks into the bathroom and stays there for a minute. I can hear him turn the faucet on, washing his hands before he comes back.
“Sorry,” I mumble.
He just gives a quick shake of his head. “It’s fine. How’s your, uhm…?” He gestures at my waist, and I lift my hoodie, inspecting the small, pinkish marks from his fingers.
Bury me with them.
Only them. But maybe close the casket, because parents.
“Shit!” he says, raking a hand through his hair. “I’m sorry, man. I didn’t… I’m usually not—”
“No, seriously, it’s fine. No worries. Guess that makes us even, right?” I chuckle.
“Yeah.” He snorts, stroking his hands over his pants. Then dragging a hand over his chin before he clears his throat. “I think I’m gonna head home.”
Okay, so awkward it is.
“Yeah, sure.”
I walk him to the door, putting my hands in my pockets, then up again. Straightening my hoodie. A hand through my hair.
“Look,” he says, a hand on the door handle. “We don’t have to make this weird, right? Friends helping friends and all that. Right?”
I nod, crossing my arms. “Yeah. No, totally.”
“Okay.” He nods, staring at me for a beat longer. “G’night.”
The door closes behind him, but I stay where I am, still staring at the door. Biting my lip.
I move a hand up to my mouth, dragging a finger across my lips. Over my chin. I can still feel the beard burn from his stubble. My hand travels down the neckline of my hoodie and I pull it up, dipping my nose inside. The scent of my cologne hits me first, and then a subtle hint of Kaden’s. I inhale deeply, closing my eyes for a second. Letting myself stay there for just a moment longer before I turn on my heel, pull the hoodie off, and throw it in the hamper.
“So…” Lou says, applying mascara to her smoky eyes. “Have you tried the pills yet?”
“Uh, yeah,” I say, licking my bottom lip, pretending to look for something off camera. I haven’t told Lou about Kaden and me. I don’t know why but most probably because I can’t believe it myself and what am I going to say? And maybe a little because I kind of know what she’ll say.
“And?” she asks, putting the mascara away as she focuses on me.
“And you could’ve warned me that it was basically Viagra on steroids.”
She laughs. “I thought you knew.”
“Well,” I say, raising my eyebrows.
“So, tell me about it.”
