“Good afternoon,” all of us mumble back in unison. Her smile is as bright as ever as she claps her hands and declares that she’s going to come around to talk to each of us about our business plans, to help us brainstorm further ideas.
“We’re going to have an opening day business showcase next Monday, if all goes to plan,” she says brightly, before dashing off to the first group of girls to discuss their plans. The class immediately erupts into chatter, about businesses and this upcoming showcase.
My stomach drops at the thought. Next Monday seems too close. Only one week to prepare everything, to be open for business and ready to beat Flávia.
When Ms. Montgomery comes around to me a few minutes later, there’s a frown on her lips.
“Nishat, I thought you were in a group of three with Chaewon and Jessica?” She takes the seat beside me and crosses her arms over her chest.
“I was, but … we had … creative differences?”
“Hm.” Her lips are pressed into a thin line. For a moment I think she’ll ask what happened and make me rehash everything in front of the whole class. But she shrugs and says, “Okay. So you’re going solo?”
I nod, thankful that she’s decided against asking any further questions.
“Well, do you have plans? Ideas? Enough to set you up by next Monday?”
“Yeah, I do!” I open up my book and take out all of the sketches and brainstorms that I’ve been working on. I hand them to Ms. Montgomery and watch anxiously as her eyes scan the pages. She sounds out the occasionalhmmsandahhsas she reads, but nothing gives away her thoughts.
“You do know there is another group with a similar idea to yours?” She asks when she’s finally finished reading.
“I do.”
“And they’re a larger group, so it might be more difficult for you to compete against them.”
“I know.”
“But you still want to stick with this? Alone?” She doesn’t say it like she disapproves, or thinks that I should change my mind, but like she just wants to confirm that this is really what I want. That I won’t have regrets later.
“I do.” I give her the most confident smile that I can muster.
“Well, I’m excited to see what you can do.” She doesn’t say it with any malice, or hope. More like sheisexcited to see what I can achieve on my own with this idea.
She slips off to the next table. I let out a breath, running my fingers through my notes and sketches.
Monday.
One week. Barely.
I can do it. Especially now that I’ve successfully lost all of my friends.
15
“WHY DO YOU LOOK SO GRUMPY?” PRITI ASKS ME WHENwe’re on the bus on the way home.
“I’m not grumpy,” I contest, even though I don’t think I can pull my lips into a smile even if I try my hardest. “I just have a lot to do this week.”
“That’s not your stressed face, it’s your grumpy face.”
I cross my arms over my chest. Priti and I don’t keep secrets from each other. Ever since we were kids, we’ve stuck together and spilled our hearts to each other like nobody else mattered. Like there was nobody elsetospill our hearts to.
The only secret I kept from her was my sexuality, and that only for a short time while anxiety gnawed away at me. I remember spending several nights restlessly tossing and turning because I was afraid of losing my sister. But like always, Priti came through for me.
She listened aptly while I mumbled the words about who I was, avoiding looking at her because I was afraid of who would be staring back. Even before I had finished, she was hugging me tight and telling me she loved me.
But the thought of telling Priti what happened with Chaewon and Jess makes me feel a little nauseous. How do I tell Priti that I might have lost my only friends to this competition? A competition that hasn’t even started yet? And what if she doesn’t understand how important it is, either?
So I stare out the window of the bus while Priti casts curious glances at me every once in a while. When my phone pings with a new message, we’re both startled out of our thoughts.
