‘She forgave me.’ I pause. ‘And she said, “Sometimes you’ve got to do what you want to do.” It was good advice.’
‘And what do you want to do?’ he says. There’s a glint in his eyes.
‘Right now? Be inside.’ But I have to ask. ‘Why did you bring me out here?’
Ty sucks in his cheeks. ‘Why is it that I can’t get you out from under my skin, Selena?’ he says hoarsely.
‘What are you talking about?’ I say. ‘You’re the one who wanted to be friends.’
Could it be that he’s changed his mind?
He steps forwards, and I step back, so I’m standing on the doorstep to the kitchen.
‘All day, all I can think about is you,’ he says. ‘All I want to do is spend time with you.’
‘I want the same thing,’ I say, softly. ‘But you said we were friends.’
Ty’s face twists, and he takes another step closer to me. ‘I know I said that.’ He’s so close to me, I can see the flecks of brown inhis eyes. Maybe this is how they look, like they’re shifting colour all the time.
‘Because you might be moving,’ I say.
‘Because I might be moving,’ he repeats, his gaze dropping to my mouth.
‘I’ve been clear with what I want,’ I say softly. ‘This is me, putting myself out there.’ My heart feels like it’s about to burst out of my chest.
‘Why are you doing this?’ he says, putting his hands on either side of my head, so I’m pinned between him and the wall. I don’t mind it at all.
‘Because it’s the truth. Why are you fighting this?’ I say. ‘You don’t know what’s going to happen, neither do I. You’re torturing both of us. Unless youwantto leave.’
The last word chokes out of me, like it’s been wanting to escape from me this whole time. That’s the fact. I am afraid Ty deep down wants to go. That’s why he’s been avoiding getting close to me.
We stare at each other for a few seconds, the air feeling even heavier than it did before, like it is about to suffocate us.
He shakes his head, and pushes himself away, spinning around to head back to his garden.
Without thinking what I’m doing, I run after him, grabbing his shoulder.
He turns around, grabs my wrist, pushes me back against the wall of the house. I feel the winter sun on my face, the chill in the air, and all I see are Ty’s brown-green eyes.
And then he kisses me. Or I kiss him. I’m not sure what happens, but we collide.
I’ve been kissed before, hell, I’ve been kissed by Ty before, but I’ve never been kissed like this.
Ty kisses me like he’s been waiting his whole life for this. It’s hungry and raw, and I’m pulling him closer and closer, as if I cancrawl into this kiss. It’s somehow angry and tender at the same time. I’ve never felt more alive.
When we finally pull away for air, he rests his forehead on mine, and for a few seconds there’s this peace between us, like it this is the way it’s meant to be.
Then he steps back. And everything snaps back to where it was before.
He rubs his face.
‘I’m sorry, Selena, I shouldn’t have done that.’ He turns and heads back to his house.
***
After the kiss, I head upstairs and lie on my bed, my head spinning. I’m emotionally exhausted.
What was that about?
