“That’s your business, Tanner. It’s been weeks, not just a couple, and so I heard you loud and clear. I’m done chasing you.” His voice harder, he says, “Thanks for the help tonight. I’ll deal with the rest and then I need to get to the hospital.”
“Deacon, please, just let me explain.”
“Not tonight.” Gentler, he adds, “I don’t have it in me tonight to make you feel better when I just want to be with my family.”
“Of course.”
Wordlessly, I grab the spray and the rag I’d left on the other table and clean the one that was just vacated, wiping down the chairs before turning them over and resting them on the tabletop.
I turn the remaining chairs up off the floor before setting the cleaning supplies back where I found them and heading for the door. A huge part of me wants to shout “See?! This is why I was scared to do this!”
But the other part knows Deacon has every right to shut me down.
At the very least, his brother and Arden are having a baby, and my bullshit dating issues should be the least of his worries.
Without giving myself time to dwell on it, I turn back around and make a beeline for the bar, my hand resting on the edge like an anchor as Deacon’s eyes meet mine.
“I’ve never chased anyone a day in my life. I don’t know how but I’ll figure it out. Becausethis,”—I motion between us—“can’t be over. I’m tired of being in my own way, and I’m sorry I was too scared to say yes.”
“Tanner.”
“I’m still scared, Deacon. I’m terrified, actually, but you’re right. You need to be with your family, and I need to figure out how to be what you need.”
The spark is back in his bourbon-colored gaze, his lips curving up on one side in a way that makes me think he’s both amused and impressed. And I’ll take it.
Because undoubtedly, I’m going to need all the help I can get.
7
DEACON
The hospital is buzzing with excitement, the waiting room bursting with joy, as I finally join everyone under the harsh fluorescent lights. In a shocking turn of events, ArdenandEllison both went into labor on the same night, the sisters both welcoming little girls into the world, which makes my heart grow impossibly larger.
I don’t know Ellison or her husband, Montana, all that well, but I know them well enough to be thrilled for them. And selfishly, it’s exactly the kind of news I need to distract me from my run-in with Tanner, my head and heart not at all in agreement on what we should do.
“I’ve never chased anyone a day in my life. I don’t know how but I’ll figure it out. Because this,”—he motions between us—“can’t be done. I’m tired of being in my own way, and I’m sorry I was too scared to say yes.”
I’d wanted to hurdle over the bar and cup his face in my hands and kiss the hell out of him, the admission more revealing than anything I’ve gotten out of him in the last several months. The mix of fire and determination was sexy as hell too.
But why now?
Jude had been vague over the phone when he called earlier, biting back the tension as he got Arden into his truck when her water broke in the middle of Boots on Bar and Grill. He told me he’d left the bar in capable hands and asked if I could just close everything down before coming to the hospital.
Thecapable handshad been Bodhi and Tanner—not that I’d seen Bodhi—and I can’t figure out if that makes tonight better or worse.
Tanner had been the last thing on my mind when I walked in, but my eyes had been drawn immediately to him like a beacon in the night. I wanted to be annoyed, but why? I’ve been pining after him since I saw him in Vetted Paws the day I went there with Jude.
And now he wants me.
Why not before?
Unhelpfully, my brain replays his parting declaration. And that’s what it was—a declaration.Shoulders back and expression intense, Tanner had stood confidently in front of me and laid it all out.
“I’m still scared, Deacon. I’m terrified, actually, but you’re right. You should be with your family, and I need to figure out how to be what you need.”
My lips twitch up into a smile as my brother comes out into the waiting room and wraps me in a hug. Jude’s never been overly affectionate but it’s radiating from him now.
He’s a dad.
