I smile, even though he can't see it."It did, which is why I feel good saying it to you.We're gonna build a life together, D.The kind of life you told me you imagined when your mom and dad adopted you.I haven't forgotten the secrets you shared with me on those nights when we slow-danced at the Lean To."
"I'm holding you to that, Mace."
We hang up, and I know with everything I am, that this man is the one I'm supposed to spend my life with.All that we need to get taken care of, is the little problem of Gerald Simmons.I know he's looking for me, I've heard that he's been back at the hospital asking about me.It might just be time to give him exactly what he wants.
"Dad and I have the steaks if y'all have the sides," Darren says a few hours later when we stand in his kitchen.Both of us have changed into more comfortable clothing.
"I think your mom and I can handle that."Ella's playing with Nicole in the living room, so we should be able to knock them out pretty quickly.
Darren leans over, kissing me on the forehead like it's the most normal thing in the world, before he heads out the back door to where his dad is heating up the grill.
"I always wanted that for him," Kelsea's voice is wistful.
"Wanted what?"I turn from the potato I'm rinsing at the sink, watching Kelsea pull out a cutting board from the cabinet like she's done it in this kitchen a hundred times before, because she probably has.
"Someone who looks at him the way you do."She sets the board down, grabbing a knife from the block."I've been waiting on that for a long time."
"Yeah?"I go back to the potatoes, though I'm listening close now, because there's something in her voice that tells me this conversation's about to tell me every single thing I’ve wanted to know about this man.
"Nick and I were young when we adopted Darren.We learned a lot about the foster system, and we watched what others went through."She starts slicing through an onion.She’s obviously done it a million times because she does it the way I see people do it in those videos on social media.“But we knew one thing.Darren was ours from the start."
My chest goes tight listening to her, wondering what it was like for Darren to be on his own in the world.Molly told me a little bit about it.
"We finalized the adoption about a year later," Kelsea continues, going back to her onion."Best day of my life, right up there with marrying Nick.Actually Nick and I married so we could adopt him.That boy's been mine ever since, and I've spent every year since then hoping he'd find someone who sees him the way I do.Someone who's not just gonna take what he offers and leave when things get hard."
There's an edge behind those words that tells me exactly who she's thinking about, and I already know, even before she says another word, that we're about to talk about Nicole's mother.
"His ex-wife," Kelsea says, and there's something flat in the way she says it, like she's chosen those two words on purpose instead of using a name."I don't say her name if I can help it.Haven't in years."
"Why not?"I’m genuinely curious.No one seems to want to talk about her that much, but I respect the decision.She’s obviously caused a lot of hurt in this family.
"Because she doesn't deserve the space it takes up in my mouth."She scrapes the onions into a bowl, moving on to the potatoes I've already peeled, cutting them into even chunks with more force than the task probably requires."She came into his life right after he made officer, all charm and pretty smiles, and I'll admit, even I liked her at first.But charm doesn't mean much when someone's not built to stick around for the hard parts."
"What happened?"
"She got pregnant with Nicole, and for a while things seemed fine.Rocky, but fine."Kelsea's jaw tightens, and I can see exactly where Darren gets that same stubborn set to his face when something's bothering him that he's trying not to show."Then Nicole came, and that woman decided motherhood wasn't the life she signed up for.Started staying out later and later, coming home smelling like places she had no business being at the hours she was, until one day she just didn't come home at all."
"God."My chest aches just imagining Darren going through that, a newborn in the house and a wife who decided she'd rather be anywhere else.
"He tried, for months, to make it work, to convince her to get help, to be there for their daughter.But some people aren't capable of showing up for the people who need them, and she was one of them."Kelsea sets the knife down, turning to face me fully now, something fierce in her eyes."He filed for divorce once it became clear she wasn't coming back around, got full custody without her even fighting for visitation, and he's raised that little girl mostly on his own ever since, with me and Nick helping where we can.The rest of our family steps in when needed."
"He's an incredible father."I don't have to think twice about that.I've watched him with Nicole enough times now to know exactly how much of himself he pours into being present for her, every single day.
"He is.Better than I think even he gives himself credit for."Kelsea reaches over, squeezing my hand where it rests on the counter."Which is why I've waited so long to see someone treat him the way he deserves to be treated.He gives everything he's got to the people he loves, Macie, and for too long nobody's given that back to him the same way."
I feel the truth of her words settle deep in my chest, and I think about every moment since I showed up on his doorstep scared and bruised, every night he's held me without asking for anything in return, every morning he's made sure I know I'm safe before he even thinks about himself.
"I'm not going anywhere."I say it with everything I've got, because she needs to hear it as much as I need to say it out loud."I know it probably feels fast from the outside looking in, considering everything with Gerald, but I love him, Kelsea.I love Nicole.I'm in this for the long haul, however long that ends up being."
Her eyes search mine for a second, like she's testing whether I mean it or just saying words that sound good in the moment.
"I've spent my whole life waiting to find my person."I keep going, needing her to understand this isn't something I'm taking lightly."I dated around some, had a couple relationships that I thought should've worked but never quite did, and I always figured maybe that just wasn't in the cards for me.Then I walked into the Lean To one random Tuesday, and there was Darren, sitting at the end of the bar, and something in me just knew."
"Knew what?"
"That he was mine."The words come out easier than I expect, considering how big they feel leaving my mouth."I didn't say it out loud to anybody, didn't even fully admit it to myself for a while, but I knew, the same way I think you knew the second you saw him and knew he was your son.Some things you just recognize the moment you see them."
Kelsea's eyes go glassy again, and this time she doesn't bother blinking it back, just lets a couple tears slip down her cheek while she pulls me into a hug that smells like onions and love.
