We stop by a park bench and sit down facing the sun. “So…Finn came over to us the other day,” Alice says before tucking her hair behind her ear. “He was asking about you.”
I suck in a breath. “He’s already come to see me.”
“That motherfuc—” Jade grits, and Alice shoots her a look.
“What happened?”
My shoulders rise as I lower my eyes. “Just that he doesn’t remember what happened that night. I told him to go away. Then Nina brought Skye to the door because she was crying, and Finn saw her. It wasn’t hard to put two and two together when she literally looks exactly like him.”
“Shit.” Jade’s mouth opens. “What else happened?”
“I met with him a few days ago without Skye. I guess my heart wanted to hear what he had to say.”
“Do you really believe he doesn’t remember?” Alice asks.
I drag my tongue over my bottom lip. “Yeah, he was pretty out of it. I probably shouldn’t have told him then, but there wasn’t a better time. He was always drunk around then.”
“You reckon he’s gonna make an effort?” Jade leans back.
Skye stirs in her pram, and I gently start to push her back and forth. “He’s been texting me.”
Alice frowns. “Why didn’t you block him?”
“I don’t know,” I murmur playing innocent, but I know exactly why.
I can’t let go even if I tried.
“What did he say?”
“That he’s sorry and he’s going to put things right.” I huff. “That he wants to be better for both of us. We all know how bad his drinking was getting, and I can’t trust him around Skye unless I know he’s sober.”
“Do you believe that’s true?” Alice’s voice softens.
“That he wants to be better for us? I don’t know. He still said what he said that night, and I get he was drunk, but it spokevolumes to me. It depends if he can actually turn his life around and prove that he wants this. I don’t want him dipping out when Skye makes an emotional connection, that’s not fair.”
And I don’t think I’ll be able to handle it, either.
Jade chews on her bottom lip, and I tilt my head at her sudden expression.
“What?” I whisper.
“I heard a rumour going around that Finn was in rehab this summer.” Jade flicks her eyes between mine cautiously.
I pause for a moment. “Really?”
“Yeah. I don’t know if it’s true, but I don’t know why someone would lie about that.”
“Yeah, well, just because he went to rehab doesn’t mean he’s sober. I’ve said this once, and I’ll continue saying it. Skye comes first. Always.”
“We know, Maya,” Alice says. “And I don’t want Finn messing up what you’ve already established, but you’re exhausted and barely sleeping. Aren’t you meant to be coming back to university at the start of next term? How are you going to do that?”
The thought makes me nauseous because I haven’t really been thinking about it. I’ve been avoiding it altogether. I’m lucky Nina is letting me crash at hers, but I’ve barely got enough money to buy all the essentials for Skye and be able to travel in and out of university.
I bury my head in my hands, realisation dawning on me. “I don’t know,” I groan. “I don't know much about anything right now. My head feels like it’s been scrambled like a fucking egg.”
My phone vibrates in my pocket, and I pull it out to see Finn’s name on the screen. I’d be a liar if I said my stomach doesn’t flip every time I see a text from him. It’s a natural response because this man won my heart despite how hard he tried to push me away. I saw what was beneath the surface.
“Finn?” Alice peers over my shoulder.
