“I…” But nothing else leaves me.
Julian leans over my body, pushing me down onto my back as he hovers over me. He seems unbothered by the streaks of dried come on my chest and stomach, or the red marks I’mpositiveare placed precariously on my skin. Instead, he watches me with heated, desperate eyes.
“I’ve seen the way you look at me,” he murmurs, his legs tangling with mine as his elbows rest on either side of my head. “You’re watching me as if you’re a startled little bunny, but I’m not stupid. I know you’ve imagined all the different ways I’d take you, if only this stupid curse weren’t in the way. Such a vicious appetite for such a sweet boy.”
My blood isboiling. He’s right. He’s so fucking right that I’m sick with need and embarrassment, my cheeks flaming in the moonlight.
“Julian,” I say, and I mean for it to sound like a warning, to get him togo away, but instead, it comes out like a soft, defeated whimper.
“Mhm,” he hums, his eyelids fluttering for a moment as if he’s been waiting so patiently to hear me call out to him like this. “Say it, little bunny. Say you’d rather it be me who fucks into you so harshly that you can’t even breathe, who whispers such sweet things to you while taking you like a whore.”
I groan, my eyes clenched shut as his words coat my entire body in a strong aphrodisiac. But even as I want nothing more than to tell him yes, yesplease, and have him take me right here—I can’t help but run myself in circles.
“I thought I disgusted you,” I blurt, my cheeks flushing even further as my hands grip the duvet beneath me, anything to keep me from reaching out to touchhim.
Julian stifles a laugh. “What? Why in the world would you think that?”
“Because you said you wished you hadn’t seen what you did… because you avoided me. You acted as if liking what I did was horrific.” In the silence following my explanation, I open my eyes, peeking up at him.
Julian is staring down at me, brows furrowed, and I can see the conflict in his expression. The confusion and the slight panic.
“I said I regretted seeing what I did because I was envious, because I wanted it to bemewho made you cry that way. There is nothing wrong with yourpreferences, and if you’re able to findsome kind of relief from this hell you’re being forced to live, then good for you.” He’s panting by the time he finishes speaking, and I stare, mouth hanging open, unsure of what to say.
He… he wasn’t grossed out? He doesn’t think that the way I crave sex is disgusting? I’m still trying to decide what to do with this information when another question rears its head.
“Then why did you avoid me?”
He sighs. “I was unsure of what to do, what to say. How was I meant to be around you when I knew the truth, but you wouldn’t let me help you? And this… this desire I have to touch you; I can’t stifle it. Even now, I’m crossing too many boundaries. Saying too much.”
“No,” I interrupt, surprising not only Julian but myself as the next words leave my mouth. “It’s not. It’s not too much. I… keep talking.”
Julian begins to grin. “So, you’ll stop lying then? You’ll let me help you?”
Could I do that? Could I admit the full reality of my condition to him and accept his assistance? What assistance could he evenofferme?
“What if my father or Atticus finds out, and they make you leave?” I ask, voicing my number one fear.
“They won’t,” Julian says confidently. “We’ll be very discreet in our time together.”
“Then… what about the days in which I’m… when I’m having a flare-up? And I’m too hot and pent up to be around anyone without making a fool of myself?” I voice myotherfear, thoroughly embarrassed.
Julian grins even harder, lowering his hips to rest over mine, where I canfeelthe outline of his erection press against my thigh.
“Then I’ll help you cool off,” he whispers, eyes bright in the moonlight that is pouring in from the skylight.
A small, defeated sound leaves me, and I’m so tempted to give in to him and accept what he’s offering me—but there is one more concern. A glaring, dangerous concern.
“And what happens when the incubus gets angry again? If it doesn’t like how close you get to me, and it tries to hurt you?”
Julian’s face twists in confusion. “Incubus? Is that what that thing is called?”
I nod.
“Well,” he continues. “I’ll just have to shoulder the consequences.”
I can see the fear in his eyes—the panic he’s trying to conceal at the thought of it retaliating again. But his warm fingers have returned to tracing my skin, and his cock is pulsing from behind layers of cotton.
“You’d risk the wrath of a demon just to help me? To…touchme?” I ask quietly.
